Sam Quote #199
Quote from Sam in Homicidal Ham
Sam: Would you look at that? Some idiot carved his initials on my bar.
Diane: It's his initials and his girlfriend's. It's sweet.
Sam: No. No, it's not sweet. It's destructive. I mean, who did that? SM plus DC. [Diane smiles] Diane?
Diane: I think it's romantic.
Sam: No, it's not romantic. It's stupid. If you want romantic, we could have our buns tattooed. Worth a shot.
Cheers Quotes
‘Homicidal Ham’ Quotes
Quote from Carla
Carla: Hiya, Sam.
Sam: Hey, Carla. Did you just get pregnant in the last five minutes?
Carla: No. I could, but this is just stuffing.
Sam: Why?
Carla: Well, I'm a little short and my rent is due, and I found out they give better tips to pregnant women.
Coach: It's absolutely dishonest, Sam. I mean, you should tell her to get rid of it.
Sam: I can't do that, Coach. She's Catholic.
Carla: Hey, would you watch it? I'm in a family way here.
[To a woman at a table as Carla adjusts her "baby bump"]
Carla: The kid's going to be a swimmer.
Quote from Carla
Cliff: [without moving] We've gotta help Sammy.
Norm: Why, what can we do?
Cliff: Uh, I don't know. Maybe we can jump the guy. He's not that big.
Norm: The gun is big. The gun's definitely big.
Carla: Maybe Diane could run in circles, flapping her arms, and draw his fire.
Quote from Cliff
Cliff: [without moving] Carla, you stay out of this. Me and Norm will handle it.
Norm: Me. What do you want me to do?
Cliff: Norm, we gotta do something. Look, trust me. Statistics show that 33% of the time a guy carrying a gun will not use that gun if challenged.
Norm: So?
Cliff: Well, so, if he's already shot two people today, you're in luck. Now get him.