Coach Quote #93

Quote from Coach in No Contest

Coach: Glad you came in today, Norm. Big day.
Norm: Yeah, what's going on?
Coach: The Miss Boston Barmaids contest. They're picking the finalist.
Paul: What is it?
Coach: What is it? Paul, it's only the biggest event of the year. I mean, words can't describe it.
Cliff: Ah, a bunch of waitresses serve drinks and one wins.
Coach: Yeah, that's about it.

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 ‘No Contest’ Quotes

Quote from Norm

Norm: [enters] Afternoon, everybody.
All: Norm!
Coach: What can I do for you, Norm?
Norm: Well, I need something to kill time before my second beer. How about a first one?
Coach: You got it.

Quote from Cliff

Sam: Oh, come on. This is not degrading. Diane, in Boston, this is considered a very big honor.
Cliff: Yeah. Yeah. Di, it's really big, you know. It's not as big as Mail Carrier of the Year, of course, but it's up there.
Paul: Mail Carrier of the Year? Who do they give that to? A postman or a pigeon?
Cliff: Hey, watch your mouth.
Paul: It was just a joke.
Cliff: Yeah? Well, don't you ever, repeat, ever, joke about the US postal service in front of me or any other mail carrier. All right?
Norm: He didn't mean anything at all by it.
Cliff: Yeah, I'd like to see how fat and sassy he'd be without his daily mail. I'm sorry, Normie, I just don't know what came over me.
Norm: That's OK. You had every right.
Cliff: Well, the Post Office is everybody's target. But when they want a letter fast, huh, who do they come to on their knees?
Paul: Federal Express.
Cliff: He's mine!

 Ernie 'Coach' Pantusso Quotes

Quote from Give Me a Ring Sometime

Coach: I'm knocking off, Sam. Home to my book.
Sam: Still working on that novel, huh, Coach?
Coach: Yeah, coming on six years now. I just got a feeling I might finish it tonight.
Diane: You're writing a novel?
Coach: No, reading one.

Quote from Peterson Crusoe

Diane: You know, it took a great deal of courage for Norman to do what he did. I admire and envy him. He has heeded Thoreau who admonished us that, quote, "Life is frittered away by detail. Simplify, simplify."
Coach: Why didn't he just say one 'simplify'?