Cliff Quote #785
Quote from Cliff in Teaching with the Enemy
Frasier: I want you all to know... I'm not blaming her. It's because of me that my life is in the arms of another man.
Woody: Uh, well, you mean "wife," don't you, Dr. Crane?
Frasier: What?
Woody: You said "life." "It's because of me my life is in the arms of another man."
Cliff: Oh, that's a- That's a Freudian slip there, Woody.
Woody: What's a Freudian slip?
Cliff: Oh, that's when you say one thing when you're actually thinking about a mother.
More Cheers Quotes
‘Teaching with the Enemy’ Quotes
Quote from Frasier
Lilith: This is a very serious matter, Frasier.
Frasier: Yes, it is serious, Lilith. However, I will refrain from indulging in cliched reactions: rage, the crying, the screaming, the hurling of epithets: Tramp, whore, slut, floozy, bitch, ad infinitum.
Lilith: You did call me slut.
Frasier: Yes, but I didn't call you a tramp, whore, floozy or bitch. I have too much respect for you even though you have been a slut.
Quote from Frasier
Frasier: Just give me a minute to, uh, to brace myself. Uh, I know, I'll simply imagine the worst thing you could possibly tell me, and whatever your news is, it will pale by comparison. In fact, whatever it is, it... It'll be a relief. Okay, okay, uh... What is the worst thing I can imagine? All right, I've got it. Lilith, your news, please.
Lilith: This afternoon, in a moment of extreme weakness I cheated on you.
Frasier: That was it! That was the worst thing!
Lilith: Try to remain calm.
Frasier: How can I remain calm when you tell me you slept with another man?! You slut!
Cliff Clavin Quotes
Quote from What Is... Cliff Clavin?
Alex Trebek: Cliff, it's all right, you don't have to worry. Unless you risked more than $21,600, you will be the new Jeopardy! champion. So let's take a look and see what your wager was. You bet "22,000 big ones"? Which takes you down to zero. You bet it all. Cliff, why would you do something like that?
Cliff: It's because I knew that those people had never been in my kitchen. You can ask them. Come on, Tony Curtis is still alive. Get him on the phone, go ahead, I'll pay for the call.
Alex Trebek: Isn't going to work, Cliff, sorry. Agnes, $400 is not a big total, but today it's enough to make you the new Jeopardy! champion. So congratulations.
Cliff: No, she's not! I'm the champion! I answered all those questions! You saw me, America! Write in and tell them!
Norm: Come on, Wood, if we sneak out right now, nobody will know we're with him.
Cliff: Tony Curtis, if you're out there, if you can hear me, call in, and I'll split the pot with you. Ah, for crying out loud, look... Any mail carriers out there?
Quote from Heeeeere's... Cliffy!
Johnny Carson: Doc is so old...
Cliff: Oh, my God, here it comes.
All: How old is he?
Cliff: Yes.
Johnny Carson: ...when he was a kid he never blew out candles on a birthday cake. They didn't have fire yet. [audience groans] Ooh, stay where you are. Fortunately, folks, in a situation like this, the, uh, the band has instructions to come over and form a human barrier in front of a star. How did that line get on the cue cards anyway? I should have done that joke with one of those big blue dots covering my face. Who wrote that joke anyway?
Cliff: I- I wrote that joke and it was great.
Johnny Carson: Pardon me?
Cliff: The problem wasn't the joke, the problem was you. You botched it. You botched my joke, Johnny Carson!
Norm: Sit down, please.
Cliff: I'm not going to sit down! I wrote that joke. Get your hands off me. Is this the way you treat your talent, Carson?! [gets dragged away by security]
Johnny Carson: Ladies and gentlemen, the president of NBC. [applause]