Frasier Quote #627
Quote from Frasier in Take Me Out of the Ball Game
Frasier: Well, I finally resigned myself to it. We've tried everything. There's no way we're gonna find Whiskers. A priceless, highly-trained laboratory animal; virtually irreplaceable, so I went by the pet store and dropped 99 cents on this guy here. Well, what the hell? They were gonna feed him to the boa constrictor anyway.
Rebecca: What's all this other stuff?
Frasier: Oh, I snuck this out of the laboratory. See, I've got exactly 48 hours to teach this guy here everything that his predecessor knew.
Rebecca: How are you gonna do that?
Frasier: Well, if... If you would, Rebecca... With a series of mazes and other such similar devices. You see, lower forms of intelligence can be trained to perform simple actions by rewarding them with food when they perform correctly, or punishing them with electrical shocks when they perform incorrectly.
Cliff: Hey, look at that, Norm, I pushed down a lever, got a nut.
Norm: Hey! I got a shock!
Cliff: I got another nut.
Norm: Ow! Hey! A shock!
Cliff: Oh, wait a minute. Let me push your lever down. Hey! I got a shock, too!
Norm: Oh! That's a mean little sucker!
Cliff: Ah, one of these times it's bound to give us a nut. Ow!
‘Take Me Out of the Ball Game’ Quotes
Quote from Cliff
Cliff: You know, there's a lot of misunderstanding about rats or Rodendus vermicitis, as they're called in Latin. It turns out our long-tailed friend wasn't, after all, responsible for the dreaded bubonic plague as alleged through history. No, sir. It's caused by an animal called the bubon. That's right. And the threat, by the way, is still with us. So if anybody does see a bubon contact your local authorities.
Carla: How about if we just see a boob?
Quote from Woody
Frasier: Well, I'd love to stick around and see how things turned out for Sam, but it's time Whiskers and I hit the road.
Woody: Oh, Dr. Crane, before you go, can I see him first? I love rats. We used to have a lot of them on the farm back in Hanover. Kept the barn free of cats.
Frasier: Woody, meet Whiskers. Oh, my God, he's gone!
Woody: Wow, that's a neat trick, Dr. Crane. Now do it with a bunny.
Frasier: No! Oh, no, Woody, you've got to help me find him! If Lilith comes back and I haven't got Whiskers, I'm dead meat!
Woody: You know, Dr. Crane, once, back in Hanover, I wanted to catch some rats and I started playing a flute and a bunch of them followed me out of town. And some children, too. Oh, wait, was that a movie? No, no, it happened.
Quote from Carla
Norm: Hey, wait a minute. Wait a minute! Carla's been here the longest. If anyone should take over, it's Carla.
Carla: Oh, no, no, no, not me. I'm the kind of person that doesn't like responsibility.
Norm: What are you talking about? You have eight children.
Carla: Well, I wouldn't if I were responsible.