John Allen Hill Quote #28

Quote from John Allen Hill in My Son, the Father

Sam: Ah, Hill.
John: Uh, Sam, you wanted to see me?
Sam: Yeth, I did. What do you think that is?
John: Well, it looks like some kind of animal tooth, Sam.
Sam: Is my tooth. I broke it on your salad. And I want you to know I will see you in court.
John: Oh.
Sam: Yeah.
John: Good heavens, this is frightening. I'm being sued. By Elmer Fudd. Listen, Sam, I don't recall selling you any crab salad. And I don't recall you being in my restaurant. What I do remember is that I gave Woody some leftovers, and you can't sue me for that. Incidentally, Sam, you're drooling.
Sam: That guy dwives me cwazy.


 ‘My Son, the Father’ Quotes

Quote from Carla

Carla: [whimpering] I'm sorry. I'm so sorry.
Frasier: Carla, you've been leaping out of your skin every time there's a clap of thunder. Surely you know it's simply static electricity being discharged into the atmosphere.
Carla: You are so naive!
Frasier: Carla, you've got to calm down.
Carla: You don't get it! I mocked God! And this is not like getting in trouble with your parents or your teachers or your boss. I mean, this is God! Famine, flood, pestilence, disease. Who do you think came up with that? [thunder rumbling] [moans] He is just toying with me now.
Frasier: Carla, you can't believe that God has a personal vendetta against you.
Carla: Look at my kids. Look at my husbands. Look at my life. What do you think?
Lilith: Uh, I don't think any major religion still propounds the theory of a vindictive God, who hurls thunderbolts and takes personal vengeance on people's transgressions. [thunder roaring] I believe that's for you.

Quote from John Allen Hill

John: Ah, Miss Tortelli, nice to see you again.
Carla: What're you doing down here, Hill? Hope you're not here to ask me for a date.
John: Date? Is that what you call it? I think we skipped dating, Miss Tortelli, and went straight to the fall of Rome. Tell me, is the rumor true your son's going to be a priest?
Carla: Yeah, what of it?
John: Well, I didn't realize you were Catholic. The only time I've heard you say anything remotely religious was that night a few weeks ago when you called me Zeus.
Carla: The hell I did.
John: You want me to run the videotape?

 John Allen Hill Quotes

Quote from Loathe and Marriage

John: People, people, it's getting late. Now no one admires the sight of a beautiful young bride more than l, but the lunch rush is the lunch rush.
Sam: Say John, I... I bet you'd like to meet Carla's first husband.
John: [takes a look at Nick] Oh, my God!
Nick Tortelli: Nice to meet you. [offers his hand]
John: Please. My profession requires that I handle food.

Quote from Head Over Hill

John: Sa-am, we have a problem.
Sam: You know, I got to be honest with you, John. The way you pronounce my name really bugs me.
John: How would you like me to pronounce it?
Sam: Sam, just Sam. You try it.
John: Sa-am...
Sam: All right, John, uh... What would you say if you were going to order a ham sandwich?
John: I don't eat ha-am.