Woody: Were you scared, Sam?
Sam: Are you kidding? I saw my hair pass before my eyes. It was unbelievable. I've never seen anything like it.

Sam: Well, guys, that's another half-hour that we wouldn't have had if we hadn't have gotten off that boat.
Norm: I tell you, a brush with death like that really changes you. From now on, I'm really going to appreciate beer.

Cliff: Ah, yes, Rebecca. Wasn't that the maiden King David spied taking a bath in her birthday suit?
Norm: No, I think that was Bathsheba. I think Rebecca is the one who turned into a pillar of salt.
Cliff: No, that was Lot's wife. She didn't have a name of her own.
Woody: What did Lot do with her after she turned into salt?
Norm: Kept her by the pretzels, I bet.
Woody: Did they have pretzels in biblical times?
Norm: Yeah. I think I just had one, too.