Woody Quote #168

Quote from Woody in One Last Fling

Sam: They sure took off in a hurry, didn't they?
Woody: Yeah, but that doesn't seem suspicious to you, does it?
Sam: No, I... I guess not.
Woody: Oh, hey, I have an idea. You go in the back and total these receipts, and we'll get out of here.
Sam: Okay. All right. Say, Woody, when I come back out here, there's not going to be a surprise for me, is there? A surprise party, maybe?
Woody: No.
Sam: You're not lying, are you?
Woody: Sam, you'd know if I was lying. I'd... I'd tell you.

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 ‘One Last Fling’ Quotes

Quote from Woody

Frasier: Hi, Wood. Let me get a beer, will you? Oh, say, what'd you do to your thumb there?
Woody: Oh, well, it's a long story, but, uh, I was playing this guy some pool last night, and I had this one-four-seven combination.
Frasier: Yeah.
Woody: So, I was trying to show off and sink all of them in one shot, but the balls were positioned in such a way that I had to lean way over the edge of the table and get in a kind of twisted-up...
Frasier: Yeah, so, what, you fell and you broke your thumb?
Woody: No. I still couldn't get the shot, so I went and got the bridge and I got up on a chair and I put all my weight on the bridge.
Frasier: And it snapped and you fell and broke your thumb?
Woody: No. I made the shot and I beat the guy.
Frasier: Oh, so he got angry and he broke your thumb, right?
Woody: No, I beat him fair and square and he paid me the ten bucks he owed me.
Frasier: So, how did you break your thumb?
Woody: I slipped on the ice on the way home.
Frasier: Woody, why did you go into all that long-winded detail about the game?
Woody: Well, now, it wouldn't have been much of a story without the pool stuff.
Man: Hello, Woody. What happened to your thumb?
Woody: Oh, I slipped on the ice.
Frasier: Woody, why didn't you tell him the long, drawn-out version?
Woody: That's the guy I was playing pool with.

Quote from Frasier

Carla: What the hell is keeping Diane? I'm gonna be late for school.
Frasier: School, Carla? Well, I must say I'm delightfully astonished. You know, I've always held that adult education is one of the finest gifts that one can give oneself. Kudos on joining the ever-burgeoning ranks of enlightened, wondering minds seeking betterment through knowledge.
Carla: It's traffic school, you nimrod.

Quote from Carla

Norm: You got pinched, huh, Carla?
Carla: Yeah, speeding. But it wasn't my fault. There was a leaf stuck on my windshield, and I had to gun her up to 80 to blow it off.
Woody: What, and the cop didn't believe you?
Carla: No. Couldn't be bribed, either.
Cliff: Carla, what, you offered a policeman money?
Carla: Money? With a body like this? Huh.