Sam: Listen, I didn't want to have to tell you this because you're pals and all, but she's coming on to me gangbusters. What are you looking at me like that for?
Diane: I can't believe you're saying this.
Sam: Well, I'll tell you something else, I need a little help here. I don't have much experience saying no to women. The closest I've gotten is, "Not now, we're landing."

Norm: When I was dating Vera, her little sister used to always prance around wearing nothing but a bikini or flimsy little shorts or something. Yeah, she used to sit on my lap, make jokes, whisper in my ear how sexy I was. So I did it. I went ahead and asked her out. She turned me down flat.
Coach: Vera know this?
Norm: Yeah, Coach. She was there at the time. She was really furious.
Cliff: I'll bet she was. I'm surprised she even married you.
Norm: Yeah, well, the ceremony was in progress. Really wasn't much she could do about it.

Diane: And Heather, I want you to meet someone else, over here. Coach Ernie Pantusso.
Heather: Hi. How do you do?
Coach: Hi, Heather. Listen, you can call me Coach or my other nickname.
Diane: What other nickname?
Coach: Satchmo.
Diane: Coach, you're thinking of Louis Armstrong.
Coach: No, but I like that even better.