Diane Quote #88

Quote from Diane in The Spy Who Came In for a Cold One

Diane: This is a night I will never forget. It so happens that I am on speaking terms with one of the poetry editors at The Atlantic Monthly. Yes, he spoke at my college once. I'm going to call him and tell him about you.
Sam: Wait. Hey, aren't you getting a little carried away here?
Diane: May I have the phone? Yes, and loving it.
Sam: Humoring the guy is one thing. I mean, he can have all the fantasies he wants in my bar. But don't you think you're going too far to make him feel good.
Diane: Sam, the poem he wrote is excellent. Scratch a liar, find a poet.
Sam: So he memorized one. What's that prove?
Diane: Sam, we are now in my area of expertise. When we want to talk about poetry, we come to me. When we want to talk about jock itch, we come to you.

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 ‘The Spy Who Came In for a Cold One’ Quotes

Quote from Cliff

Cliff: All right, here's a little-known fact. The smartest animal...
Norm: Yeah?
Cliff: ...is the pig.
Norm: What? They look pretty stupid.
Cliff: Yeah, your average oinker. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Scientists say if a pig had thumbs and a language, he could be trained to do manual labor.
Norm: You mean they'd be part of the workforce?
Cliff: Yeah, yeah. They'd give you 30 years of loyal service, then at the retirement dinner, you could eat 'em.

Quote from Sam

Diane: You bellowed?
Sam: Yeah. Yeah, I did. What are you trying to do?
Diane: I don't believe that guy's a spy for one minute. I think he's lying.
Sam: What? A customer in a bar is telling tall tales just to impress a waitress? Call 60 Minutes.
Diane: All right, when you put it that way. The thing is...
Sam: Look. Look, listen, why do you suppose people come to bars in the first place?
Diane: Oh, let me take a wild stab at that one. Perchance to drink?
Sam: Wrong. Wrong. They could do that at home. They come here to shoot off their mouths and get away with it. Listen, in this bar everybody gets to be a hero. Now, what's the harm?

 Diane Chambers Quotes

Quote from No Help Wanted

Diane: Sam, now, it's true, hiring Norman has emotional overtones. But without emotions, the mind becomes a stagnant pond. And let's face it, in your case, we're not exactly dealing with white water rapids in the first place.

Quote from Sam's Women

Diane: Sam, do yourself a favor. Go back to your tootsies and your rat parts. I'd hate to see the bowling alleys close on my account.
Sam: Hey, hey, wait a minute. Wait a minute. Are you saying that I'm too dumb to date smart women?
Diane: I'm saying that it would be very difficult for you. A really intelligent woman would see your line of BS a mile away.
Sam: You think so?
Diane: Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
Sam: You know, well, I've never met an intelligent woman that I'd want to date.
Diane: On behalf of the intelligent women around the world, may I just say... Phew.