Norm: [enters] Afternoon, everybody.
All: Norm!
Man: Hey.
Woody: What's going on, Mr. Peterson?
Norm: Let's talk about what's going in Mr. Peterson. Beer, Woody.

Sam: So, how come you guys are so chummy, huh?
Norm: Sorry, Sam. Can't talk about it. Kind of private.
Sam: Oh, give me a break. Guys are supposed to talk about girls behind their backs. [Norm swallows hard] Didn't I tell you everything about me and Diane? [Norm shakes his head] Well, now's your chance to thank me.

Frasier: Boy, look at her. What a glow she has. You know, strange as it sounds, there are actually times when I resent being a man.
Cliff: Ah, that's all right, Fras. Sometimes we resent you being one. [Sam laughs]
Frasier: I was referring to Carla's condition. You see, she's able to do something we men never shall: experience the miracle of creating a new life.
Sam: You know, I'll have to admit. I've often wondered what it would like to have another human being moving around inside you.
Woody: Must be spooky, but real neato.
Sam: Yeah.
Cliff: There's probably nothing so awesome in the entire universe.
Frasier: Yes, gentlemen, I'm afraid that we've been relegated to the position of observer. Passive, sitting on the sidelines. Doomed by nature to a life of envy.
Carla: God, feels like there's a dump truck parked on my bladder.
Frasier: Well, then again, nature is wise in her way.

Carla: I am a little worried about the direction this bar is taking.
Sam: How so?
Carla: Well, it just doesn't seem right when the stakes for a game of pool is a round of wine spritzers.
Frasier: Not even the pool room is safe from the encroaching hordes of yuppiedom. How long will it be until we're all suffocated beneath an avalanche of alligator shirts, German cars, and racquetball club memberships? Oh, oh, by the way, Sam, uh, may I have another Perrier with lime?

Sam: You can't cut off one of our regulars. The poor guy is unemployed.
Frasier: Look, Miss Howe, uh, Norm here is in a very delicate spot. His self-confidence has been shattered. Uh, what he needs from us now is help and support. Isn't there some other way to resolve this problem?
Rebecca: Well, you could pay his bar bill.
Frasier: Norm, the woman will not listen to reason.

Norm: Oh, uh, you got a phone call here, uh... Eva Ake? I could swear it was a man. Oh, well, there's paint here. Evan Drake. Uh...
Rebecca: That's my boss.
Norm: Yeah.
Rebecca: What did he say?
Norm: Well, he said, he, uh he wants you to tear up my bar bill. [off Rebecca's look] I... Well I didn't think I'd get away with that.

Rebecca: Um, would you mind locking up for me?
Norm: No, no, I don't mind at all. Listen, would you please not, uh, mention that I like painting to the guys? Cliff already thinks I'm a weenie.
Rebecca: Well, from what I've seen, he's an authority.

Rebecca: What makes me think this belongs to you?
Sam: [gasps] My jasmine scented oriental massage oil. Oh, God. God, I thought I'd lost this.
Rebecca: I found it wedged underneath the couch cushions in my office.
Sam: Ah.
Rebecca: I don't think I want to know how it got there.
Woody: I'm kind of curious.
Sam: Tell you what. Why don't you, uh, put that back where you found it, and that way, we'll know where it is when we need it.
Rebecca: When hell freezes over.
Sam: Well, that's perfect, 'cause this stuff heats up when you rub it in.

Sam: How's the job-hunting going?
Norm: Oh, lots better, Sam. Today I actually got turned down for an executive position. [Rebecca places her hand over Norm's glass] It's a good way to lose that.
Rebecca: I'm sorry, Mr. Peterson. You've been cut off.
Norm: Oh. Okay, where's the camera?
Rebecca: This is no joke. According to my books, you are way over your credit limit.
Sam: Well, what's the big deal? What's he over, 10, 20 bucks?
Rebecca: 837.
Norm: But in other words, under $900, huh?

Norm: All right, well, l, uh I did a little house painting in college. You know, to make ends meet.
Cliff: [laughs] Norm, Norm, Norm. Norm, I think they're talking about a job where you get, uh, paid with money, not with little grain pellets dropped out of a chute.
Norm: Cliff, you, uh, you got something against painters?
Cliff: [laughs] No, no, no. I- I'm in favor of hiring the blithering. [laughs]
Sam: Do do you need any painting done around here?
Rebecca: I guess you could repaint the office. Are you willing?
Norm: It's been an awfully long time.
Cliff: Oh, yeah, yeah. It's gonna take you at least, what, seven or eight seconds to relearn that skill. [laughs]
Frasier: You know, Cliff, I'm beginning to pick up a little thread here. Would you mind explaining this little obsession you have about painters?
Cliff: Well, all right. Uh, well, it's manual labor. I mean, it's beneath you, Norm. Well, if you take a job like this, we're gonna be on entirely different social strata. We'll have nothing to talk about, all right?
Norm: Semigloss or enamel?