Sam: Hold on a second here. You're not- You're not serious about quitting Cheers, are you? Because if you are-
Carla: No, you don't have to tell me. I can read your mind. You're afraid that we're gonna grow apart, and we're not gonna be friends anymore, because I'll be a psychic, and you'll be a lowly bartender.
Sam: Honey, you remember when you- you were reading my mind? Well you- you didn't get as much right as you thought.
Carla: Oh, yeah? What did I get wrong?
Sam: Everything.
Carla: But everything was so clear! Well, okay, maybe I didn't read your mind, but I was definitely reading somebody's mind, because those images were as clear as day.
Sam: Come on, Carla.
Carla: Okay. All right. Who here had a mother with black hair and a Labrador retriever? Come on! I can't be the only one! Oh!

Carla: Hello, Bob.
Madame Lazora: Madame Carla, study Bob's aura. Tell me, what do you see?
Bob: Can you see something?
Carla: Yeah, I can see something. I can see that you're a sucker, a big dope. For 20 years you've been forking over your hard-earned cash to a sleazy con artist. You have been taken in by the cheapest, most obvious scam in the world just because you wanted to believe it. I see that you should wise up, chump. [exits]
Madame Lazora: That will be $50, please.

Rebecca: Carla, your psychic called.
Carla: Madame Lazora called me?
Rebecca: Yeah, she's coming by today.
Carla: Madame Lazora is coming by?
Rebecca: Maybe she just wants to say hello.
Carla: Oh, no, no, no, no. You don't understand. Madame Lazora does not just say hello. She must have had a horrible premonition of me getting hurt or killed or... or pregnant.

Frasier: Look, Carla, if you're really concerned what this charlatan has to say, why don't you just call her?
Carla: Yeah, you're right, Doc. I might as well just get it over with. Wait a minute. What if she was calling me to warn me to keep away from telephones? What if she's seen a vision of me horribly disfigured in a telephone accident?
Frasier: Carla, don't be ridiculous.
[As Woody walks in from the back room, he is caught by the neck on a telephone cord as a man uses the pay phone]
Norm: Woody, you okay?
Woody: Oh, I don't know, Mr. Peterson. Uh, this is bad. I can't breathe. I can't move.
Man: [enters] Hey, Woody, your review is out.
Woody: It is?! [runs up] Oh, boy! Oh, boy! I can't wait to read it!

Woody: Uh, what does he say about me?
Norm: And he sort of goes on and on.
Woody: No, no, go ahead, read it. I can take it.
Norm: "Woody Boyd is weak."
Woody: "Weak"? Is that all? Not handsome and weak?
Frasier: Well, Woody, you know what they say, "There's no such thing as bad press as long as they spell your name right."
Lilith: Actually, it says "Woody Doyb is weak."

Sam: Madame Lazora, let me go get Carla; she's gonna want to see you right away. She's been kind of worried.
Madame Lazora: I sensed she would be worried.
Cliff: How did she know?
Norm: Amazing.

Carla: Just tell me it's going to be quick and painless.
Madame Lazora: I don't understand.
Carla: You don't foresee a hideous disaster in my future?
Madame Lazora: Of course I do, but that's not why I'm here.

Madame Lazora: I have decided to retire and move to Florida at the end of the year. I see myself on Miami Beach with those muscular cabana boys.
Sam: See? I told you there's nothing to worry about.
Carla: "Nothing to worry about"? Madame Lazora has been my spiritual advisor since I was 17 years old. Without her my life would've been a complete disaster.
Sam: Honey, I thought your...
Carla: Well, it could have been worse.

Woody: Oh, no!
Rebecca: What is it?
Woody: It's my director, Lee Bradken.
Lee Bradken: Uh, is Woody Boyd here?
Woody: [o.s.] Tell him I'm not here.
Rebecca: I'm sorry, Mr. Bradken, he's not here.
Lee Bradken: How did you know my name was Bradken?
Woody: [o.s.] Tell him it was a lucky guess.
Rebecca: Lucky guess.
Lee Bradken: Who's that person crouching by the side of your leg?
Woody: [o.s.] Okay, give me a minute on this one.

Lee Bradken: I'm not saying your performance was weak, Woody, but if it was - and it was - then maybe, that's because, as an actor, you're afraid to examine your- your own feelings. Here, I want you to do an exercise. Write down your true feelings as they come to you, okay? Now, how do you feel right now?
Woody: I feel weak.
Lee Bradken: Not what other people tell you to feel. Do you really feel weak?
Woody: I feel strong.
Lee Bradken: Darned right you do. And how do you feel about that critic?
Woody: Am angry.
Lee Bradken: So? How are you gonna get even?
Woody: TP his house.