Rebecca: Well, everyone, you are looking at a winner.
Carla: You were the best kisser-upper? Gee, what does that trophy look like?
Rebecca: I did not kiss up. I gave an interview. I gave one hell of an interview. I was tough, I was insightful, I was witty. Meryl Streep will play me in the movie.

Rebecca: Wait a minute. Here we have a man who doesn't know how to promote his business. And here we have a woman who knows everything about promotion, but has never really been given a chance. Now, if I can turn a beer-guzzling nobody into a successful businessman, then those guys down there at corporate will see that I can do anything.
Norm: Uh, much as I love your pitch, Rebecca, uh, I'm not comfortable working with friends.
Rebecca: Oh, forget about friends. In the cold light of reason, consider this: Please, please, please, for Becky?
Norm: Nah, nah, I'd rather work by myself.
Rebecca: Okay, fine, Norm, fine. I'll just go back to what I was doing. Going over these delinquent bar accounts. Whoa. Now there's a rather huge one in the "P" section.
Norm: [sighs] Welcome to Team Peterson.

Rebecca: Oh. I don't believe this! And I thought they were really impressed with me, and they were just staring at this big, old stupid ink blot.
Woody: It's not that bad, Miss Howe. It's kind of decorative. It looks like, uh, a bunny.
Carla: No, no, it looks like a spider.
Sam: Or a butterfly.
Cliff: Uh, it looks like my parents having a screaming argument on my third birthday when I pretended to be asleep but wasn't. Or a butterfly.

Norm: [enters] Afternoon, everybody.
Sam: Yo-ho.
All: Norm!
Sam: Beer, Norm?
Norm: Have I gotten that predictable? Good.

Cliff: Hey, weren't you supposed to have a painting job today?
Norm: You're right, Cliffie, I did, but I screwed it up. Turns out I was supposed to show up yesterday. So they went ahead and hired somebody else. Like they couldn't open the restaurant a damn day later.
Cliff: Well, you know, you might be the world's greatest house painter... although who would know the difference? But, you know, as a businessman, you really leave a lot to be desired, you know. You haven't had a job in three months.
Norm: Cliff, you're absolutely right. I could do something about that. Or I could sit right here and feel sorry for myself and nurse this beer all day. And since I'm already here...

Cliff: You know what's wrong with our lives?
Norm: Yeah, we have lousy jobs with poor pay. We both waste all our time sitting on our cans in this beer hall doing nothing but watching TV and gossiping like a couple of old ladies. Plus, everyone thinks we're dufuses.
Cliff: Geez, you know, I was just going to say we could probably use a little bit more exercise, but, uh, I'll go along with what you said.
Rebecca: Oh, Norm, there you are.
Norm: Oh, gee, how'd you track me down?

Norm: [phone ringing] Now, what is it about Rebecca's history that makes me think this is going to be bad news? [answers phone] 4-A Painting. Yeah. Mm-hmm. I knew that. Yeah, well, thanks, anyway. [hangs up] Damn, damn, damn.
Cliff: What's the matter, Norm?
Norm: Well, that was the developer. They signed with their painters and we're out.
Cliff: So, uh you gonna chase Rebecca down before she quits her job?
Norm: I guess I really should, huh?
Cliff: But then again, she hates her job, so, well, well, is it gonna be that bad if they can her?
Norm: Maybe you're right. I mean, what's the worst that could happen?
Cliff: I don't know, just find somebody else to run the bar, that's all.
Norm: Right. Oh, my God. My bar tab could fall into the wrong hands. [finds Sam laying in the doorway] Sammy, nice socks, man.

Mr. Anawalt: So, you've worked here six years and you've been treated like hell. Hmm.
Rebecca: But I've never been happier in my life. And I'd never want anything to change. Thank you for letting me get that off my chest. [heads out] Damn it. I'm doing it. [turns back] Mr. Anawalt, I have something else to say, and this is it. You wouldn't know a good marketing executive if one came up and bit you on the butt. Now I am better and smarter than 50% of the people that work here, and if you can't see that then you are blind or a buffoon. Take your pick. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to Cheers where I am sure all my personal belongings will be waiting for me in a Hefty bag on the street.
Mr. Anawalt: Miss Howe.
Rebecca: What do you want now?
Mr. Anawalt: You have a lot of nerve talking to me like that. This company was built on nerve. Not enough young people have the guts to stand up and say what they're really thinking. I've been looking for that brave child who wouldn't be afraid to say, "The emperor has no clothes."
Rebecca: He's nude, sir. Buck naked.

Norm: A development company has a small apartment complex, okay? They're having a contract problem with their regular crew, so we're up.
Rebecca: Oh, it's happening.
Norm: Well, it's just a little eight-plex. Okay? Now don't get crazy.
Rebecca: Norm, Ray Kroc started McDonald's with one little hamburger.
Norm: Uh-huh.
Rebecca: Colonel Sanders started with one little chicken. We are on our way to the top, Mister. How does that make you feel?
Norm: Makes me feel like having a Big Mac and a bucket of wings, actually.
Rebecca: That's my boy.

Norm: [coughing]
Mrs. Rosenbush: My God. Are you all right?
Norm: I just ran.
Mrs. Rosenbush: Up 40 flights of stairs?
Norm: God, no. Just from the elevator.