Diane: But this is quite a surprise. You've only known each other a few months, and you're moving in together? That's pretty impetuous.
Lilith: Well, a week ago, we decided to take a chance on cohabitation, but we waited a week before announcing the news, so as to avoid putting any undue pressure on the success or failure of the endeavor. And now we are pleased to announce the effort a limited success.
Diane: Yes, pretty darn impetuous.

Frasier: All right, uh, Diane and I were engaged to be married and she left me at the altar. The whole experience was so humiliating, l- l- I've just been trying to forget it ever since.
Lilith: Your feelings for her were genuine?
Frasier: Yes.
Lilith: And it's only on account of her action that you're not married to her at this very moment?
Frasier: Well, I- I never really looked at it that way.
Lilith: And if Sam were out of the picture, you'd throw me over and run back to her, wouldn't you?
Frasier: I don't love her anymore.
Lilith: You switch your passions on and off very quickly, Dr. Crane.
Frasier: I do not!
Lilith: Then you do still love her!
Frasier: Well, I never did!
Lilith: You were going to marry her!
Frasier: Well, maybe I just thought I loved her!
Lilith: How do I know you don't just think you love me?
Frasier: Well, I don't. I mean, I- I didn't I- I never... I will not be grilled like a common criminal! [slams the bathroom door]
Sam: [to Lilith] Cheese knife?

Frasier: Doctors Sternin and Crane are proud to announce that they are now officially POSSLQ's. [chuckles]
Lilith: It means "Persons of the Opposite Sex Sharing Living Quarters."
Frasier: Yes.
Diane: Oh.
Frasier: You see, it's a little, uh, lovers' in-joke we picked up from a Census Bureau acronym.
Woody: Oh, I love those.

Sam: Love what you've done with this place, man.
Diane: Oh, yes, I love the masculine touches.
Lilith: Thank you.

Diane: Now look here, Lilith, you needn't worry about Frasier carrying a torch for me. I assure you he feels nothing but resentment toward me. He knows I was using him to forget the real love I felt, and feel, for Sam here.
Sam: Is there any more Chex Mix?
Diane: You see, Sam is my real love. I'm ashamed to say that Frasier was a convenient dalliance on my part, at a time when I needed someone, anyone. I'm sorry it was him.
Lilith: So, essentially, Frasier was a toy you played with briefly and then threw away.
Diane: Well, it wasn't that bad.
Lilith: A fellow human being, whose emotions you twisted for your own satisfaction, with no consideration for his feelings.
Diane: Frasier had some fun. We would speak nothing but French on Sundays.

Frasier: Hey, what're you doing there, Norm?
Norm: Oh, Vera signed me up to give a speech at her Women's Auxiliary Club. [Sam chuckles] I hate public speaking.
Frasier: Yeah, you're not alone there, pal.
Norm: Well, it's awful, you know. You're standing there in front of a group of total strangers, palms sweating, your throat dry, your mouth feels like it's full of cotton, your knees practically buckling.
Frasier: It can be a miserable experience.
Norm: I tell you.
Frasier: So what's the topic?
Norm: "Poise: The Key to Success."

Sam: Oh, now no guy's going to tell his brand-new girlfriend about all the women he... You know.
Lilith: Oh, but there must be no secrets in that area. That's where honesty counts most.
Sam: Gee, you know, l- l'm afraid I don't think that's such a good idea.
Lilith: You mean the two of you, planning marriage, haven't already had this discussion?
Diane: Of course we have.
Sam: Well, Diane's told us about both of hers, and we're just about up to the Johnson Administration on mine.

Frasier: I heard it all. How could I have been so blind?
Lilith: Don't blame yourself.
Diane: That's right. You can't blame anyone in these situations.
Lilith: He can blame you.
Diane: Now look here. Our relationship was a two-way street.
Frasier: Yes, and I was run over in both directions.
Diane: Oh, Frasier, you had fun.
Frasier: Diane, I never had a whit of fun, especially on Sundays. And the only thing more egregious than your French pronunciation is your syntax.

Frasier: I'm home, sweet potato.
Lilith: Just a moment, cinnamon bear. [they kiss] How was your day?
Frasier: Oh, I want to take you now, by the dip.
Lilith: You impulsive man. We have guests coming.
Frasier: Yes, I know. It'll be our little joke on them. Every time they say the word "dip," we'll become giddy with remembrance. The word itself will become a syllable filled with our overwhelming passion.
Lilith: Dear, you're using sex to express your aggression toward the confines of polite society.
Frasier: Dip.
Lilith: I love that.

Lilith: Why do you insist on displaying your magazines in that insipid accordion design?
Frasier: I'm sorry if this one little touch of theatrical flair is too much for your retentive nature.
Lilith: We'll go into my retentive nature later. For now, we have guests coming. [rearranges the magazines again]
Frasier: You know, I see what you're trying to do here. You want me to begin the argument that you wish you could start yourself. Well, I will not do it. If you want to have an altercation, you will have to-
Lilith: [throws the magazines at Frasier] How could you be late on a night like this?! Didn't you know I'd be nervous making my first dinner in your house while your stupid friends are looking at me and judging my every move? I'll never forgive you for this! Never, never, never, never! [doorbell chimes]
Frasier: Just a minute! Darling, I think that was a real breakthrough. So come out of the bathroom, and after dinner, we'll build on it. But, our- our guests are here now. Dear heart? [doorbell chimes] Darling. Coming! Coming!