Sam: Mr. Finch, whatever, I don't know what your real story is, and the last thing I want is for you to tell me, but I wanna thank you for entertaining us here tonight. I'm really glad you came. [shakes hand]
Eric Finch: Thank you, Sam. My real name's Thomas Hilliard III.
Sam: Well, whatever.
Eric Finch: Well, you have a very charming saloon here.
Sam: Thank you. I'm glad you like it.
Eric Finch: And to show you how much, I'd like to buy it. [Sam laughs] How much is it worth to you, Sam?
Sam: This guy's not gonna give up. Wait, let me guess. Let me guess. You are an eccentric millionaire who hangs around bars and tells stories about himself to have fun with people, right?
Norm: Kinda like Howard Hughes, Mr. Hilliard?
Eric Finch: Don't mention that name. He died owing me money. Well, Sam, how much? [all laugh]
Sam: Well, gee, this is kinda sudden. Let's see, I guess, 20, 30 people come here every night. $1 million seems fair to me.
Eric Finch: You've got it.
Cliff: Hey, Sammy, I think you're forgetting the jukebox.
Sam: He's right. I'm sorry. $2 million.
Eric Finch: I think you're taking advantage of me, Sam. [hands check]
Sam: Hey, look at me everybody. Scratch a bartender, find a millionaire.