‘Breaking In Is Hard to Do’
Season 9, Episode 7 - Aired November 1, 1990
When Robin sends Rebecca romantic letters from prison, she is desperate for a conjugal visit. Meanwhile, Norm has to keep running to a new parking meter outside Cheers, and Frasier and Lilith discuss Frederick's childcare.
Quote from Frasier
Woody: Hey, hold it. l- l'll settle this. Let's pick an arbitrary way to make the decision. All right, whoever has the most freckles on their arm stays home with the baby.
Lilith: I think that's an excellent way to choose.
Frasier: Oh, you would say that. You have no pigmentation in your skin.
Quote from Carla
Rebecca: No, Carla, you're right. I know. Who am I fooling? I can't write this stuff. Besides, what good is a dirty letter? Just fun words on a piece of paper.
Carla: You know, you're right. You need your man. We got to sneak you into that prison so you can get what you need.
Rebecca: Oh, that's a great idea.
Carla: Yeah, let's go.
Rebecca: Oh, but wait a minute, wait a minute, I don't know which cell is Robin's. How will we find him?
Carla: It has to be Robin? Th- There's lots of guys in there. You might find someone you like better. Come on.
Quote from Woody
Rebecca: Sam, we're going to be gone for a couple hours.
Carla: Girl stuff.
Woody: Girl stuff? Why do they always say that? What does that mean? [Sam whispers in Woody's ear] Oh, Sam, I didn't want to know that.
Quote from Robin Colcord
Robin: Darling.
Rebecca: Robin, I got your letter.
Robin: Oh, yeah, I hope I didn't go too far.
Rebecca: Did you mean everything you said?
Robin: Every word. And those little drawings in the margin, yeah.
Quote from Cliff
Frasier: 5:00 already? We've been here all day.
Woody: Time to get the little guy home, huh, Dr. Crane?
Frasier: Well, Lilith doesn't get home until 6:00. Say, darts, anyone? Paul?
Paul: Yeah, sure.
Frasier: Cliff, you coming?
Cliff: Uh, yeah, I'll be right there. [grunts angrily] This thing's harder than the civil service exam.
Quote from Carla
Carla: Hey, cheer up. He said he'd be out in a couple of months.
Rebecca: Yeah, sure, so what am I supposed to do until then?
Carla: Tell you what. There's, uh, some construction workers down the street. What about you and I go cruising?
Rebecca: No, I can't cheat on Robin.
Carla: Man, I thought we were going to be close.
Rebecca: Well, maybe it wouldn't hurt if we just paraded around them and frustrate them a little bit.
Carla: There you go.
Rebecca: Let's do it. All right. Let's spread the pain around.
Sam: Uh, where are you guys going?
Both: Girl stuff.
Woody: Ick!
Quote from Sam
Lilith: I feel like a failure. A failure as a mother, ergo as a woman and a person. Do you make a drink for failures here at Cheers?
Sam: Uh, hold on a sec. Phil, what are you drinking?
Phil: A Manhattan.
Sam: Manhattan.
Quote from Lilith
Sam: You know, sweetheart, I'd bet my bottom dollar that you're a pretty good mom.
Lilith: Yes, well, considering that endorsement comes from a perennial Peter Pan with no sense of maturity or obligation, you'll excuse me if I don't leap over the bar, embrace you, and say, "Really, Sam? You think so?"
Sam: Well, glad I could be there for you.
Frasier: Hey, guess what, everybody? Little Frederick beat Cliff at darts.
Lilith: Frasier!
Frasier: Uh-oh.
Lilith: What are you doing here? I didn't give my son to you so you could run off and spend the day in a bawdy house.
Quote from Carla
Rebecca: Oh, man. I don't think I can go through with this here. The thought of a lot of people being a few feet away, and somebody could discover us at any minute.
Carla: What, you're saying that like it's a bad thing.
Rebecca: Part of me wants to stay here and the other part of me wants to run.
Carla: All of me wants to strip down, lay on the grass, and yell, "Fumble!"