‘Bad Neighbor Sam’
Season 9, Episode 10 - Aired November 15, 1990
Sam is irritated by the pompous new proprietor of Melville's, John Allen Hill. Meanwhile, Woody fears that Kelly is cheating on him in France.
Quote from Sam
Sam: You know, I... I don't know if I like this guy so much. He seems kind of snooty.
Rebecca: He's not snooty, Sam. He's sophisticated. I think this bar could benefit from his kind of class.
Sam: Oh, come on. Cheers is classy enough the way it is. [party horns tooting]
Quote from Carla
Carla: Have you ever seen so many Yuppies with gold cards?
Rebecca: John Allen Hill worked his magic, and we reap the benefits.
Carla: I love these charge slips. Look at here. They put down a five for a tip. Now, all I have to do is stick a one in front of it... And I got 15!
Quote from Woody
John: Everyone, may I have your attention? Melville's patrons are no longer welcome here. Would you please join me upstairs for a complimentary cocktail?
Sam: No, whoa, whoa. Not you, Norm.
Norm: Carla! Carla, bring me one down!
Sam: Hey, Carla, get- Get out of line. Well, I think I handled that quite well. Nobody messes with Sam Malone, least of all some hairless king of the snobs.
Woody: Wow, that was a real shot at you from out of nowhere, huh, Dr. Crane?
Quote from Sam
Carla: Can you believe the nerve of that guy putting up a wall like this?
Sam: [shouting] you know the Constitution guarantees us certain rights, among those the right to go to the bathroom and the right to play pool!
Carla: Way to tell them off, Sammy.
Sam: Actually they wouldn't let me in 'cause I wasn't wearing a jacket, but he can hear me!
Quote from Frasier
Woody: [holds the phone] It's him. It's the thumb guy. And you know what that pervert said to me? "Allo." What does that mean in English?
Norm: Wait, wait, wait, wait. No, I took some French in high school. I think "allo"... "allo" means, um "I've got your girlfriend in my arms and, uh, soon we'll be naked, you stupid cuckold."
Cliff: Oh, yeah, that's- That's funny, Norm, because I thought it meant, uh, "I've got your girlfriend in my arms and we're already naked, you stupid cuckold."
Frasier: Oh, for God's sake. Stop hectoring the poor lad. Woody, it simply means that "I enjoyed your girlfriend." [guys laugh]
Quote from Sam
Sam: I'm taking things into my own hands here. I hate that damned wall. I'm gonna put my bar back the way it was.
Carla: Coming out, no more bets.
Sam: Uh, excuse me, you may want to move over here just a little bit. Fellas, you may want to take note where you were the day the wall came down. [Sam takes a few tiring swings at the wall to no effect] [pants] Is it down yet?
Quote from Carla
Rebecca: Sam, now I don't want you to be mad at me, but I brought Mr. Hill here to settle this whole ugly mess between the two of you. Please say you'll talk to him.
Sam: Oh, sure, I'd love to talk to him.
Rebecca: Not with the sledgehammer.
Sam: Aw, I wasn't gonna actually, you know, hit him with it. I was just gonna drop it on his foot by mistake.
Rebecca: No, Sam.
Carla: Sammy, just let me have it. [thud]
Rebecca: Ow!
Carla: It would have worked, Sam.