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‘Windbreaker City’ Quotes

Brooklyn Nine-Nine: Windbreaker City

215. Windbreaker City

Aired February 8, 2015

As Jake continues to feel bad about his break up with Sophia, his spirits are lifted when the squad is invited to a Department of Homeland Security anti-terror drill. Jake's hopes for a win dissipate when the agent in charge gives them the lame role of playing hostages. Meanwhile, Holt is disturbed by the results of a personality test Gina administers, while Amy and Rosa battle for a day off work.

Quote from Jake

Jake: "Uh-oh, hope it doesn't get too sexual." Title of your sex tape. But seriously, what is taking so long. Also the title of your sex tape.

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Quote from Captain Holt

Gina: You got category I9 C3 G6.
Captain Holt: I9 C3 G6? Is that as good as it sounds?
Gina: You have a robust sense of self and are well suited to leadership positions. Characteristics: strength, determination, tenacity.
Captain Holt: Yes, I suppose that's accurate. They do call me Tenacious Ray down at the country club. Because for the past ten years I've been suing them for discrimination.

Quote from Gina

Captain Holt: Gina, you know I appreciate you, but you have to admit we're not exactly cut from the same cloth.
Gina: Apparently not. I am, of course, exotic silk, where you, sir, are snake skin.

Quote from Hitchcock

Jake: So you just want us to lie on the ground and do nothing like a bunch of losers?
Agent Kendrick: Yes, precisely.
Jake: No!
Hitchcock: Jackpot!

Quote from Hitchcock

Amy: I don't like it. Something stinks.
Hitchcock: Well, I'm sorry, but I refuse to mask my natural musk with a bunch of chemicals.

Quote from Scully

Agent Kendrick: What are your demands?
Jake: A guarantee that this drill doesn't end until one of us is dead.
Charles: Also, one large pizza with fennel sausage - brick oven, otherwise it's sog city. And Scully needs some Gasinex, extra strength.
Scully: Chewable!

Quote from Scully

Scully: I really need that Gasinex. I think there was some dairy in the cheesecake that I ate for breakfast.

Quote from Scully

Scully: Oh, I could take that shift.
Captain Holt: The last time you worked a Saturday you watched cartoons the entire time.
Scully: Well that's when they're on.

Quote from Captain Holt

Captain Holt: I'm no stranger to unflattering test results.
[cut to Holt in a Doctor's Office]
Doctor: Your blood pressure's normal.
Captain Holt: Normal? Take it again!

Quote from Charles

Jake: Okay, Boyle. There's two guards outside these doors. We need their guns. You know what to do.
Charles: Beat them up?
Jake: Pretend to be sick and lure them in here.
Charles: Right, the Charles.

Quote from Captain Holt

Captain Holt: Gina, you're tenacious, you're strong. You're a great leader. And, most importantly, any basic bitch would be lucky to be like you.

Quote from Rosa

Amy: Why didn't you tell me? I had no idea things were getting that serious.
Rosa: Yeah, it's very embarrassing having feelings.

Quote from Gina

Gina: I need someone to take this personality test for my psych class. I was hoping to wow my professor with a genuine psycho. Like Amy. Or Hitchcock. Or Charles would be great.

Quote from Jake

Jake: No offense but you are a huge waste of muscles.

Quote from Jake

Jake: Look, we came here to win and they're not even giving us a chance. I think it's fair to say no one in the history of America has been discriminated against more.
Rosa: Buddy.
Jake: Yes, that might be adrenalin talking.

Quote from Gina

Gina: You're trying to get me bumped out of I9 C3 G6. You don't like that the test put us in the same category. That is so rude. Do you know how many basic bitches would kill to have the same personality as me?

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords

Jake: I catharted.
Sergeant Jeffords: You catharted hard.

Quote from Gina

Gina: It's crazy how much he flirts with me.

Quote from Charles

Charles: What you got there? Candle, perfume, bra. Someone's dropping off a care package for mom.

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords

Sergeant Jeffords: You need to destroy that stuff. You want me to crush that big box into a little ball with my bare hands?


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