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‘The Ebony Falcon’ Quotes Page 1 of 2

Brooklyn Nine-Nine: The Ebony Falcon

114. The Ebony Falcon

Aired January 21, 2014

When Sergeant Jeffords returns to fieldwork in an undercover operation, Jake tries to keep his emotions in check. Meanwhile, Amy and Rosa come to Gina's aid after she's robbed.

Quote from Gina

Rosa: You don't have locks on your windows?
Gina: Way to blame the victim. Sorry I'm not rich like you, Ms. 1%.
Rosa: They cost $8. You have a fur bed spread.

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Quote from Jake

Jake: All right, we're doing this. Let's play wife or dog. Hey, so, Scully, what do you do at the park with Kelly?
Scully: Oh, we just walk around. She gets antsy if she doesn't get outside enough. Then it's just yap, yap, yap, yap, all day long.
Charles: Hey, what's Kelly's favorite food?
Scully: Peanut butter. She'll eat it right out of the jar.
Sergeant Jeffords: How old is Kelly again?
Scully: Well, she's getting up there, but she's pretty sprightly for her age. Especially considering she got hit by that car a year ago.
Jake: Ah, that's so awful. Was she chasing something into the street or..?
Scully: No. She was getting me the newspaper.
Jake: All right, this is useless. Scully, is Kelly your wife of your dog?
Scully: How can you ask me that?
Jake: I still don't know which it is.
Charles: Could be either.
Jake: I could not tell you.

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords

Sergeant Jeffords: What's my name?
Jake: Terry Jeffords.
Sergeant Jeffords: What is my name?
Jake: The Ebony Falcon.
Sergeant Jeffords: And what does The Ebony Falcon do?
Jake: Takes every precaution to ensure his own safety.
*Terry breathes heavily*
Takes bad guys to jail and bad girls to bed.
Sergeant Jeffords: Hell yeah he does. Except now the Ebony Falcon is monogamous and too tired for sex so his only indulgence is fresh-fruit yogurt parfaits.

Quote from Jake

Sergeant Jeffords: What are you doing, Peralta?! You just blew my cover!
Jake: Or did I save your life?
Sergeant Jeffords: Or did you compromise an investigation and piss off a superior officer?!
Jake: I'm sensing from your tone it's that one.

Quote from Charles

Jake: Yes! The Ebony Falcon soars again.
Charles: The Ebony Falcon. His feathers are muscles.

Quote from Jake

Jake: Hey. Have you seen Terry? I lost him. His children could be orphans already. Father-less mother-having orphans.

Quote from Jake

Jake: Terry Jeffords is back. Chest bump me.
Sergeant Jeffords: You don't want to do this, man.
Jake: No, I really do.
Sergeant Jeffords: It hurts you every time.
Jake: No, I know, but I'm fired up and the adrenaline is going to carry me through.

Quote from Charles

Charles: He is so strong but so gentle. He's like an enormous, muscular Ellen DeGeneres.

Quote from Charles

Jake: We have to get Terry off this case.
Charles: What? Why?
Jake: Look, I thought he was a weirdo for his year-long freakout. But I get it now. He has children. What happens to them if he gets hurt? I'll have to take care of them.
Charles: Or his wife, or other family, or his more mature friends. But interesting point.

Quote from Gina

Gina: Do you have any connections in the FBI or CIA? There's no one else I can turn to to solve this crime.
Captain Holt: Gina, you work in a police precinct. You can turn to anyone here.
Gina: You think these buffoons can help? They're buffoons.

Quote from Sergeant Jeffords

Sergeant Jeffords: I just need to put my precious babies to bed with a story. The Ebony Falcon needs to read Go, Dog, Go.

Quote from Gina

Captain Holt: $160 in cash. One TV. One large painting of a naked woman on a lion. One set of Joseph Gordon Levitt nesting dolls.
Amy: Wow.
Gina: Homemade and irreplaceable.
Captain Holt: One music box that plays "She Works Hard For The Money" when opened. One knock-off designer clutch.
Rosa: Can't you just buy another knock-off?
Gina: No, I Can't, silly Sue. 'cause the label no longer makes the original, so the sweatshop no longer makes the knock-off.

Quote from Gina

Rosa: Can you estimate the value of everything that was taken?
Gina: Emotionally? Seven hundred million dollars.

Quote from Jake

Jake: Hey, your kids like the same cereal as me.

Quote from Jake

Charles: The Ebony Falcon.
Jake: No, the Ebony Falcon had no fear. He's the Ebony Antelope now. Brave enough to drink at the lake, but wise enough to run from the lions.

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