Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Captain Holt Quote #256

Quote from Captain Holt in The Audit

Captain Holt: Make space.
Jake: You make space! This closet is for people who are freaking out.
Captain Holt: Oh, I'm fully freaking out. I just experimented with an unfamiliar acronym in public. BRB what does it even mean?
Jake: Be right back.
Captain Holt: It has the same number of syllables as the acronym. What's the point?

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‘The Audit’ Quotes

Quote from Charles

Captain Holt: The auditor will start by joining Peralta and Santiago on their gang stakeout because-
Charles: They're America's dream couple.
Captain Holt: You need to calm down. We're in a workplace.

Quote from Charles

Captain Holt: Now, what do we do about the rats?
Charles: Well, lucky for us, I have recently come into a lot of wolf urine.
Rosa: That's lucky for us how?
Charles: It creates a scent impression that there are predators nearby. I've been dousing Nikolaj's shoes with it to scare off bullies at his preschool.
Rosa: Did it work?
Charles: No, now they call him pee boy. He's much worse off. But wolf urine definitely scares off rats. We can use it to herd them toward the traps.

Quote from Charles

Charles: Oh, God, they're gonna shut this precinct down and separate me and Jake. Our friendship is over. If he doesn't see my face every day, he'll forget who I am. He's like a goldfish.

Captain Holt Quotes

Quote from The Mole

Captain Holt: Nothing's okay. Wuntch, circling me like a shark frenzied by chum. The task force turning into a career-threatening quagmire. An Internal Affairs investigation casting doubt upon my integrity. And you ask, is everything okay? I am buffeted by the winds of my foe's enmity and cast about by the towering waves of cruel fate. Yet I, a Captain, am no longer able to command my vessel, my precinct, from my customary helm, my office. And you ask, is everything okay? I've worked the better part of my years on earth overcoming every prejudice and fighting for the position I hold, and now I feel it being ripped from my grasp, and with it the very essence of what defines me as a man. And you ask, is everything okay?

Quote from The Cruise

Debbie: Look at you. Always working. What happened to my fun big brother?
Captain Holt: Fun? I was never fun. You take that back.

Quote from The Wednesday Incident

Captain Holt: Coat, coat, jacket, coat. Is this a police precinct or a Turkish bazaar?