Shawn: Nobody saw us. No witnesses. And without witnesses, it's all just circumcized evidence.

Shawn: I don't want to die before I know what woo is.

Mr. Feeny: Well, happy anniversary. And I hope you have others.

Topanga: Cyrano performs a totally selfless act and he does it for the sake of love. That is so romantic.
Shawn: Why? What does he get out of it? He knocks himself out spewing poetry, his friend gets the girl All he can do is go home and blow his big nose.

Topanga: Boys don't understand passion and romance, and will never understand women. And that's why all of you will spend half your lives confused and the other half paying alimony.

Alan: Amy, call me crazy, but this is exactly what you said you wanted.
Amy: Yes, Alan. And a trash compactor would be a lovely gift on say a Tuesday.
Alan: You said you wanted compactor. I get compactor. Why Ugh wrong?
Amy: We don't want to be late for dinner.
Alan: Ugh not sleep in cave tonight.

Cory: Well, that's real sad and tender and what do you want from us?
Frankie: Help me woo her.
Shawn: What?
Frankie: Woo her.
Shawn: What?

Frankie: I want you guys to coach me.
Cory: Frankie, I don't know if we're the guys to help you woo her.
Shawn: What?

Cory: Shawn, we just helped Frankie snake Harley's girlfriend. I mean, we gave him love lessons, we hid in the locker, we told him what to say. How is that not trouble?
Shawn: OK, let me think. Uh, protective custody, plastic surgery Ah! We dress up as girls, pretend we're our out-of-town cousins and say we haven't seen ourselves.
Cory: No, that'll never work.
Shawn: Oh, yeah? Tell my Uncle Mary.