Lucille: Where the hell did you run off to?
George Sr.: Michael tried to kill himself. I got there in time to save him, but he doesn't have Buster.
Lucille: What?
Narrator: Which was good news for Tobias, who was already in his backup costume.
Tobias: And my name is Buster Bluth, and, yes, I am a monster.
Police Officer: Buster? Isn't he supposed to be in jail?
Tobias: Well, that's not exactly what I was going for, but sure. [groans] Oh! But they're buying it, see?

Michael: Did you tell them that you found Lucille 2 passed out on the stair car?
Buster: I think I said "dead." No, maybe they said "dead," and I said, "I wish."
Michael: Why'd you do that?
Buster: I thought it was funny. [laughs] Oh, by the way, I also told you that I saw her on the stair car, Michael.
Michael: I thought you were trying to be funny.
Buster: You've got a weird sense of humor, Michael.

Buster: Maybe she crawled away. She was always falling down or crawling away or rolling off-camera and stuff. I don't know why it's a crime to not know where someone is.

Michael: Why were you trying to erase a tape?
Buster: I panicked. I had had a fight with Lucille 2 because she made me miss Mom's trial, and I guess somebody saw us fighting, and if anything happened to her, you know they love to blame it on the crazy vet. [gasps] Oh. I'm trying to do air quotes, but they metal-strapped my hand because people were using it to make tattoos when I was asleep.
Michael: What's going on with the other?
Buster: Oh, this is so I don't take the metal-strap off.
Michael: Got it.

Lucille: Michael said Barry would be here with Buster over an hour ago.
Gob: Maybe Buster made him stop to make sure nobody found the body. [chuckles]
Lucille: Oh, Lucille 2's fine. Believe me, she's somewhere with a new chin, sipping steak through a straw.

George Sr.: You know, if Buster was a murderer, your mother would be in grave danger. Maybe I should move into the cottage with you two. That way, one of us can always be awake.
Tobias: Lucille, as your therapist, I would encourage you to let go of relationships that don't serve you.
Lucille: You're no longer my therapist.
Tobias: Okay. We're making some progress. Then, as your roommate, I encourage you to claim your space.
Lucille: You're no longer my roommate.
Tobias: Wow, you are just progressing by leaps and bounds. [chuckles] A victim of my own competence.

Gob: [laughs] Oh-ho-ho! Michael, you did it! You didn't know that Barry was in jail? [laughs] God, this is so This is hysterical. This is priceless. One for the ages, Dad. No, this is never gonna get out of my system. [laughing breathlessly]
Michael: You okay?
Gob: What made you think Buster was in jail? Two seconds ago, you thought that he was gonna kill you.
Michael: True.
George Sr.: Gob, Buster is in jail.
Gob: Oh. Right. We were just there. Michael made an honest mistake. Geez, I hope Buster doesn't kill us for laughing.

Narrator: Michael decided to tell Rebel he was going somewhere. George Michael, meanwhile, was approaching the same apartment with a plan of his own.
[flashback:]
Maeby: You take my bag of lacy ticklers, hoo-ha bras, dog toys, and sex knobs with you, and you act like you're expecting a booty call, as the old people think the young people say. Tell her, "I'm here for a quickie, and I'm out of here." Mr. Brash.
[present:]
Narrator: So when Michael saw his son brashly approaching, he decided to be the adult in the relationship and avoid conflict by squatting in a bush, until his son passed on his way to what the young people refer to as a booty call.

George Michael: Yeah, standing out here with a bag of sex toys! Let's go! Not getting any less horny out here. How are you?
Woman: I think she's gone until tomorrow.
George Michael: Is she? Okay, good. 'Cause I was getting less, uh... what I mentioned earlier.

Lt. Toddler: Well, I'm going home.
Michael: Okay. Great.
Lt. Toddler: I live here.
Michael: Oh. Didn't know they paid you that fair. Yeah, good for you. [quietly to himself] That is one dirty cop.