Michael: It all makes sense. Why else would Sally Sitwell be avoiding me?
Lindsay: Because she thinks you're a loser.
Gob: And why would Lucille 2 be so distant toward me?
Lindsay: 'Cause she knows you're a loser.

Buster: What are you doing here?
Gob: I'm keeping an eye on the woman who controls our company.
Buster: In her robe and slippies?
Gob: Getting into her head. I think she's planning on selling our company to Stan Sitwell. But I've lost her trail, and I don't think I have the skills to pick it up.
Buster: Skills?
[Buster drops to the floor and rolls away. Four minutes later, he comes up behind Gob in Lucille 2's apartment and holds an army knife to his throat.]
Buster: These kind of skills?
Gob: Not really. But if you give me one of those outfits, we can hide in the bushes and spy on them.
Buster: I would like to see her again. You've got it.

Maeby: Hey, Michael. My dad wanted me to thank you for the romantic getaway. Don't tell me what that means.
Michael: Where is your dad?
Maeby: He left, dressed all western-y. You could leave me out of that part too.
Narrator: And Michael realized that perhaps somebody would get hurt.
Michael: I just screwed my brother-in-law.
Maeby: Well, I'm all grown up now.

Narrator: And soon, Michael and Tobias awaited their massage therapists.
Michael: So, uh, Tobias, I'm afraid that your wife might not actually end up here with you.
Tobias: You know, Michael, perhaps I should buy you that tape recorder. Do you have any idea how often you say the word "afraid"?
Michael: Well, I know I used it in the Jacuzzi.
Tobias: And I apologize for that. I thought it was a pool toy.

Tobias: Ah, Valentine's Day, which- [slips] Oh! Was your mother here?

Michael: Lindsay, I'd like for you to go over to Sitwell and see what you can find out. I can't go there again.
Lindsay: Why do I have to do that?
Michael: Because you've been helping yourself to the company money for some time. It's not like you do anything for the family anyway.
Lindsay: Gob doesn't do anything for the family.
Gob: Hey, I'm [bleep] Lucille 2.
Lindsay: Oh. I could do something like that.
Gob: This is what Dad was really good at, getting us out of tight spots.

Narrator: In fact, at that very moment, George Sr. was in a tight spot as he'd gotten himself wedged under the furnace while chasing after a sour ball that had rolled out of his pocket.
George Sr.: [sighs] [howls]
Narrator: Eventually, Michael rescued him.
Michael: I'm starting to worry she's gonna sell us out.
George Sr.: I think the answer to this problem is money. Now, this may just be me having my head against a hundred-degree furnace for an hour, but maybe we should bring in Jack Dorso.
Michael: Uncle Jack?
George Sr.: Well, no. He's not my uncle. He's, uh, my dad's friend. But, uh, this guy has got a fortune.

Narrator: Jack Dorso first achieved success in the '40s as a costar of the radio and then film serial, Red McGibbon and Bullet: Nazi Hunters. When the actor who played Red McGibbon was jailed for his Communist sympathies Jack Dorso made one attempt at a solo Bullet feature. But the audience was not ready to accept Bullet as a romantic lead despite his powerful upper body. So he started a chain of gymnasiums having stolen the idea from Red during a prison visit. And as the years passed... He became well-known for his annual birthday feats of strength. Sadly, he lost the use ofhis legs on his 70th birthday at the newly-remodeled Jack Dorso's in Albany, New York.

Michael: Well, if he's got so much money, how come we never called him before?
George Sr.: But I have. I mean, there wouldn't be a Bluth Company without him. I could never have afforded that first tract of land. But he always wants something in return. I don't know. See if you can talk your mother into taking another bullet for the Bluth family.

Narrator: The family gathered at Lucille's to welcome and solicit Uncle Jack. And remember, he wasn't really their uncle.