Tobias Quote #77

Quote from Tobias in Switch Hitter

Michael: Do you wanna say something or should I, Tobias?
Tobias: No. I believe in letting children learn from their mistakes, Michael. They make a mistake once, they shan't make it twice. [leans against the refrigerator] Oh, here I go! Don't worry. It has not fallen into the garage.
Knock on wood. [loud crash]
Michael: You gonna want to help me with that?
Tobias: No, I can't. I have an audition tomorrow. I'm up for a minor, but meaty, role in a feature film. "Confidence Man Two."
Gob: Oh, yeah? I didn't see the first Confidence Man.
Tobias: No. Confidence Man Two is my character. I think I'll drive up today and plot my route to the studio.

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 ‘Switch Hitter’ Quotes

Quote from Lucille

Lucille: Get me a vodka, rocks.
Michael: Mom, it's breakfast.
Lucille: And a piece of toast.

Quote from Maeby

Maeby: How do you think I feel? He said he would help me on this essay for The Old Man and the Sea.
Michael: I'll help you with that later.
Maeby: Oh, great. Okay. So you have to read this, and then explain it and, this is important, say it in my own words, okay? Smart, but not too smart. Let's have a four-syllable max.

Quote from Maeby

Maeby: How 'bout I come with you? I mean, I could help you prepare.
Tobias: Yes, well, it's for a con man, which I don't think you know anything about. And besides, don't you have school?
Maeby: No. Um... Today is "Help Your Dad Follow His Dream" day.
Tobias: [chuckles] Great. We can take the carpool lane.