TV Quotes

Narrator: Gob had just blown up a car.
Gob: The next thing I know, I'm running for my life. And all I could think was, if something were to ever happen to me how sad I'd be, you know?

Narrator: Michael Bluth was working at home when his son made a curious request.
George Michael: Dad, would anyone miss this Peter and the Wolf read-along record?
Michael: No. Actually, I think that's part of the model home decorations. Why?
George Michael: You're right. My girlfriend Ann wants to have a Christian music bonfire here.
Michael: That sounds like some mild fun. I think we've got some Christmas music.
George Michael: Oh, no. It's not- It's not a "Christian music" bonfire. It's a Christian "music bonfire." You know, we burn all satanic music. The thing is, though, the only music I have is either instructional or humor.
Narrator: He'd been particularly fond of a CD of something called The Jerky Boys.
[flashback:]
Michael: [answers phone] Hello.
George Michael: Hey, nitz. Hey, jerky. I wanna buy a house, Dad. It's gotta be big.
Michael: You- You said "Dad," buddy.
George Michael: Shut up, jerky.

Lucille: I'll have the Ike and Tina Tuna.
Waitress: Plate or platter?
Lucille: I don't understand the question, and I won't respond to it.

Lucille: Don't you judge me. You're the selfish one. You're the one who charged his own brother for a Bluth frozen banana. I mean, it's one banana, Michael. What could it cost, $10?
Michael: You've never actually set foot in a supermarket, have you?