‘My Mother, the Car’
Season 1, Episode 8 - Aired December 21, 2003
Lindsay talks Michael into throwing Lucille a surprise party, even as he tries to cut back on the family's expenses by selling the yacht Gob is living on.
Quote from Lindsay
Lindsay: Come on, Michael. Who knows how long our parents are going to be around.
Michael: I gotta tell ya. I was over at her place today, and she looked a little frail. She was having trouble even lifting up this bag of groceries. All right. We will do the surprise party.
Maeby: For Gangie?
Michael: Yeah, how did you know?
George Michael: She called and invited us.
Lindsay: Okay, so it was her idea.
Maeby: We don't have to go, do we?
Michael: Come on. This is a Bluth family celebration. It's no place for children.
Quote from George Michael
Narrator: George Michael was finally moving beyond his crush on Maeby and felt happy to have a cousin he could just see a movie with.
Movie Narrator: It was a love between two cousins that the world thought was wrong. But it was the world that was wrong.
George Michael: We have got to see this movie.
Movie Usher: Excuse me, kids? Can I see your IDs? [Maeby runs off]
Quote from Lucille
Lucille: Are we going to the back? Is this what I think it is? [gasps] Surprise!
Narrator: And she was surprised... that her family didn't show up.
Lucille: So this is what my children think of me.
Quote from Narrator
Michael: Buster? You of all people. Where were you, buddy? You barely even leave Mom's apartment.
Narrator: In fact, Buster was worried about running into Lucille 2. So he never left his mother's apartment. Lucille 2 was also supposed to go, but was waiting until she saw Buster emerge.
Quote from Lucille
Lucille: How are you feeling?
Michael: Actually, my head does not hurt at all. What did you give me?
Dr. Miller: Your mother asked me to pump you full of...
Lucille: Children's aspirin.
Dr. Miller: Okay.
Quote from Lucille
Lucille: Buster, what's going on? What happened to your head?
Buster: Nothing. Gob was just teaching me how to hit it with a hammer.
Michael: Gob was there. Gob was on his scooter. [Lucille picks up an antique] I think I wanted to hit Gob.
Lucille: Yes. That is exactly what happened. You wanted to give Gob a scare. I don't know why.
Michael: I think I do. [Lucille hands Michael the antique] Thanks, Mom.
Quote from Gob
Narrator: Gob rushed to shore to spare his brother from what he was certain were his mother's machinations.
Michael: What are you doing?
Lucille: [o.s.] Hey. Open this door.
Gob: You've been set up.
Lucille: [o.s.] Michael!
Gob: There's no way you were trying to hurt me. You don't hate me. Mom hates me. You kind of like me.
Michael: Yeah. I kind of like you.
Gob: Yeah.