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Justice is Blind

‘Justice is Blind’

Season 1, Episode 17 -  Aired March 21, 2004

Michael is conflicted about betraying Maggie (Julia Louis-Dreyfus) and taking the evidence file against George Sr.

Quote from Michael

Michael: Let's just assume that it will happen again at some time.
Maggie Lizer: Right. Right.
Michael: We just need to, you know, acknowledge this and keep it private, and I don't think that there's anything wrong with that.
Maggie Lizer: Right. I have a job, you know? I'm trying to keep a man in prison.
Michael: Right. And that man happens to be my father. This could get ugly.
Maggie Lizer: Well, it's like the Ten Commandments saying. "Be true to thine own self, and to thine own self..."
Michael: "Be true." Yeah. Number seven.
Maggie Lizer: We'll just have to keep it a secret.
Michael: Our secret.
Maggie Lizer: Our dirty little secret.
Michael: I think I'm ready now.


Quote from George Sr.

Gob: Apparently, there are boxes of it at the prosecutor's house. I tracked down the address, and you should be thanking me for this. Michael didn't want you to have it. Mr. Moral.
George Sr.: [holding Lucille's hand] Mm. Yeah, we did something right there, huh?

Quote from Barry Zuckerkorn

Lucille: So what do you think, Barry?
Barry: l-I haven't read it. I had a really interesting date last night. A woman who actually works two jobs.
[mug shots of Barry]

Quote from Tobias

Narrator: Tobias, meanwhile, had used his catlike agility to get the evidence at Maggie's house.
Tobias: The cat is in.
Narrator: Unfortunately, it was just as Maggie came home.
Maggie Lizer: [sniffs] Is there someone here?
Narrator: Tobias, concerned about Maggie's heightened sense of smell set off to cloak himself in her scent.

Quote from Michael

Veterinarian: Justice is fine.
Michael: Great.
Veterinarian: Although, dressing him up like a seeing-eye dog seems a little cruel.
Michael: Cruel?
Veterinarian: Well, yeah, because he can't see.
Michael: What are you talking about?
Veterinarian: Mr. Bluth, Justice is blind.

Quote from Michael

Michael: Justice cannot be blind, Doc. He's got a handle and everything. Come on, boy. [Justice jumps off the table into a trash can] Maybe his peripheral isn't great but he's been leading a blind woman around.
Veterinarian: I think she's been leading him around.
Michael: But that would mean that Maggie isn't blind.
Narrator: In fact, Maggie wasn't blind, but had been pretending to be...
Michael: Son of a bitch.
Narrator: Since she found it helpful in taking the LSATs.

Quote from Narrator

Narrator: Her ability to see, however was currently proving a disadvantage as she couldn't reveal to the man she recognized as Tobias that she knew he was there without betraying her secret. And Tobias was finding her an uncannily difficult blind girl to outmaneuver. Their game of cat and mouse continued. Until Michael showed up to return Justice.
Maggie Lizer: Oh, Justice, what is it, boy? What is it? Is there some jackass in my bathrobe? [Tobias pepper sprays Maggie] Oh! I can't see!

Quote from George Sr.

Narrator: And later, the family gathered at the courthouse to respond to the plea offer.
Gob: They don't have a case against us. I took care of everything.
Barry: Something smells wonderful.
Tobias: Well, thank you. Would that I could say that I wore it to impress you but, no, I'm afraid it's merely a cloaking agent from a sadly blunderous afternoon.
George Sr.: Who else have we got? What about Buster? Worst-case scenario: he gets caught, no more Buster.
Buster: I'm not going anywhere. You're the one who's staying put. Not me. You.
Lucille: What's gotten into you? Have you been eating cheese?

Quote from Michael

Michael: Your Honor, the purpose of a court of law is to find the truth which is why witnesses swear on this. After all, they say justice is blind. Surely, she has enough sight to catch the truth before it hits her in the face.
Maggie Lizer: Objection, Your- [Michael throws the bible at Maggie's face]
Narrator: Unfortunately, Maggie had been temporarily blinded that day.
Judge Ping: Bailiff!
Michael: That was my plan. What do you got?
[George Sr. runs out of the courtroom]

Quote from Michael

Narrator: And Michael reunited with Maggie, who had been kicked off the case.
Michael: I really thought you were lying to me. I am so sorry.
Maggie Lizer: Michael, I've been doing this blind act thing for years. It's wacked.
Michael: Are you going to admit that you were faking it?
Maggie Lizer: I think I'm gonna go for "I was struck by the Bible and it restored my sight."

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