Michael: Besides, I doubt very much Mom's come up with a real disease to have a fund-raiser for.
Lindsay: I forgot. We have a real disease. I chose it. G.V.H.: Graft Versus Host. It's new, it's fatal, and guess who's got it?
[flashback:]
Dr. Carr: You've heard of bodies rejecting transplants? Well, in this case, your transplanted hair is rejecting your body. Either you remove your hair graft, or the host - you - will get sicker and eventually die.
Lindsay: Can you think of any benefits?
Dr. Carr: Benefits? No. He'll die.
Lindsay: Oh, yeah, no, I get that. But have there ever been any fund-raisers?
[present:]
Lindsay: A husband with the headlining disease. Everyone's going to want to talk to me.
Michael: You're making him keep the hair?
Lindsay: Did you see the attention Superman's wife got?