Previous Episode Next Episode 

‘Colony Collapse’ Quotes Page 1 of 3    

Arrested Development: Colony Collapse

407. Colony Collapse

Aired May 26, 2013

Gob plans a biblical magic trick after inadvertently proposing to Ann Veal.

Quote from Gob

Narrator: Gob was waiting to meet his son at a bar and feeling a little vulnerable.
Gob: Lost my wife, lost my career. When I was in that storage unit at the bottom of that rock, it was like I hit...
Steve Holt: Rock bottom?
Gob: No, no, not that. More like a trending downward moment that just I don't know. Maybe I'm being tested like that guy "Jawb" from the Bible.
Bartender: Job.
Gob: Yes?
Bartender: Job.
Gob: Yes, sir.
Bartender: Job.
Gob: Yeah.

Rate

Quote from Gob

Narrator: Gob was surrounded by unconditional love from a family for the first time in his life.
Gob: I've made a huge mistake.

Quote from Michael

Narrator: Gob shared his happy news at a meeting with his family.
Michael: I'm sure Gob helped himself to the money.
Gob: Hey, I got mouths to feed.
Michael: Mouths?
Gob: Mouth. Her.
Michael: Oh, hey, mouth. I didn't see you sitting there.
Ann: We rode up in the elevator together.
Michael: I'm blanking.

Quote from Gob

Gob: "A lot of traffic out here today, Miss Daisy."

Quote from Gob

Gob: You're lucky that I'm chasing after our girlfriend, or I'd have to flatten you! Way to plant, Ann.
Ann: You told me George Michael knew about us.
Gob: Well, he does now, my darling plant.
Ann: Ann.
Gob: And after I dazzle everyone tonight on the Queen Mary, my magic career will take off as surely as there's a mouse behind your ear. [Ann screams] Well, as surely as there's a mouse behind your ear. [Ann screams] Mouse behind- [Ann screams] Okay, you are like the only person I know who doesn't just love magic.
Narrator: A poll would confirm she was far from alone.

Quote from Gob

Ann: Well, you have to make things right with George Michael, otherwise you don't get to fourth base.
Narrator: Of course, Ann's concept of fourth base was very different than Gob's.
Ann: But you have to promise me you'll always be faithful.
Gob: Faithful? Of course I can be faithful.
Ann: Until tonight, when we're together...
Gob: Oh! Until tonight! Well, of course I can be faithful. Don't be stupid. You think I can't keep it in my pants in front of a bunch of doggy old women and my family? Don't be stupid. Who am I gonna hit on, stupid? My sister? Lindsay? Don't be stupid. She's my sister, that's gross. Now, you have got some mice to scoop out of the sea.

Quote from Gob

Gob: These are all part of an act I was going to do. Two drowned white doves, for "flowers to doves." This was a rabbit for "doves to rabbit," also drowned. These were mice-
Tobias: For "rabbit to mice."
Gob: No, that can't be done. No, these were part of a something I called "Mice-a-laneous." "Mouse in purse." "Mouse in drink." "Here's a mouse, now it's gone."

Quote from Gob

Narrator: But it was another man that Gob needed to make things right with George Michael if he was ever going to deflower Ann Veal.
George Michael: Uncle Gob.
Gob: Are we good?
George Michael: No.
Gob: No, how could we possibly be? But- But are we good?
George Michael: No! You stole my girlfriend.
Gob: That's a tough thing, and, you know, sometimes you have to ask yourself, "Are we good?"
George Michael: Is it over between you guys?
Gob: No. But are we good?
George Michael: I don't know what you want to hear from me, Uncle Gob. I mean, yes, we are good-
Gob: There it is! There it is! Ah! From a nephew to his uncle, and just the "yes," the much-vaunted "yes," that he gets. Look at you, full of "yes." Look at how much "yes" is in you! I knew it! I knew I'd get that "yes" from you. Look who got a "yes"! Got my "yes."

Quote from Gob

Gob: Yeah, me and Blank are getting the old Christian magic act back together. I mean, you don't expect people to actually believe that I'm Jesus if I'm walking around in rags.
Michael: You're resurrecting that mumbo-jumbo?
Gob: Look, everybody's got a gimmick. Tony Wonder's making a fortune with that gay magician act.
Narrator: Gob's long-time nemesis had come out of the closet and used it to great advantage in his act.
Gob: Besides, I have to do something for the wedding.
Michael: Who's getting married?
Gob: Her!
Michael: Who's marrying her?
Gob: Me. Did I not open with that?
Michael: You sure didn't.
Gob: Yeah, I'm getting married! [silence] I didn't want to make a big deal about it.
Michael: You haven't.
Gob: Well, my wedding's going to be religious-y and epic and expensive, which is why I need more of that stimmy money. Thanks, Mike.

Quote from Gob

Gob: Then I, too, have an announcement to make! At our wedding, I will be performing one of my famous magical illusions. That once your eyes have beholden it, you will put no God before me, because of its spectacularity. And, of course, I only propose to do this out of love for...
Ann: Ann.
Gob: And God. Love for and God. Let me pray. Dearest beloved Gods...

Page 2 
 Previous Episode Next Episode 
  View another episode