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Bringing Up Buster

‘Bringing Up Buster’

Season 1, Episode 3 -  Aired November 16, 2003

As Michael worries that George Michael is pulling away from him, Lucille tries to get Buster off her hands.

Quote from George Sr.

George Sr.: Let him go. Let your son go.
Michael: I can't do that, Dad. He needs me.
George Sr.: Michael, you don't want to make the same mistake your mom made with Buster.
Michael: Yeah, boy. What happened there?
George Sr.: I really don't know. Maybe it was the 11 months he spent in the womb. The doctor said there were claw marks on the walls of her uterus, but... He was our miracle baby, you know? And l-I was just too burned out on raising you guys to care. So, he turned out a little, uh, soft. [Buster yawns] A little doughy. [Buster yawns more loudly] I don't know. Maybe- Maybe it was my fault. Maybe I just ignored the guy.
Buster: Wow. We're just blowing through nap time, aren't we?
Michael: Yeah, I gotta let my son go.


Quote from Buster

Narrator: Back at the model home, Michael was adjusting to the absence of his son, by enjoying the company of his brother.
Michael: You know, I'm in pretty good shape. You could be eating my dust all day, slowpoke.
Narrator: And Buster was starting to give as good as he got.
Buster: Yeah. And you might be eating... [bleep] [bleeping continues]
Michael: Well, let's hope it doesn't come to that.

Quote from Buster

Gob: She always makes everything about her.
Lindsay: Ugh, she's the last person I ever want to need something from.
Michael: Well, she likes to be needed, just as long as it doesn't cost her anything.
Buster: It's like she gets off on being withholding.
Michael: Whoa, Buster.
Gob: Look who's got something to say.
Buster: [giggles] I'm Mom, and I wanna shoot down everything you say so I feel good about myself. [laughs]
Gob: Look who's ragging on the old lady.
Lindsay: Finally.
Buster: 'Cause I'm an uptight- [long bleep] Buster! [long bleep] You old horny slut!
Michael: Well, no one's gonna top that.

Quote from Gob

Michael: So why are you in your robe?
Gob: I camped out in the boardroom last night. What with you kicking me out of your house there are few places left that you have that I can stay.
Michael: Hmm. Well, you can't stay here either.
Gob: Let me ask you something. Is this a business decision, or is it personal? 'Cause if it's business, I'll go away happily. But if it's personal, I'll go away. But I won't be happy.
Michael: It's personal.
Gob: I am so sorry.

Quote from George Sr.

Narrator: It was Sunday morning, and Michael was making cornballs. A Bluth family favorite since George Sr. unsuccessfully tried to market the device in the mid-'70s.
[flashback to George Sr. filming an infomercial with Richard Simmons:
George Sr.: Time to pull out the basket and we dig into some hot- Son of a bitch!
Richard Simmons: Oh, look what you did! You plopped it!
George Sr.: I'll plop you!

Quote from Tobias

Tobias: Michael, if I could stick my pretty little nose in here for one second. When I was a psychiatrist and this is before I became an actor-
Lindsay: You're still not an actor.
Tobias: Lovely. I saw a lot of this type of behavior and I think what you're experiencing is your son's very normal need to distance himself from his overbearing father. Am I touching something? Hot! Hot, hot. Hot.
Michael: Be careful.
Tobias: Hot.
Michael: You all right?
Tobias: Hot. [sighs] Now, take my daughter, for example. She lives her life and I get the pleasure of guessing what that might entail. Now watch this. Maeby, where are you off to on this glorious Sunday afternoon? [quietly] She won't tell me.
Maeby: I'm going to audition for a play.
Tobias: Well, that time it didn't work. What play?
Maeby: It's for high school. You can't audition.
Tobias: I was totally wrong. She's reaching out to her actor daddy. Does anyone have an ice pack?

Quote from Lucille

Lucille: [on the phone] Look, I have a child that costs me money too, you know. Why can't you get a job?
Lindsay: What is it with this family and working? Michael just gave me the exact same lecture in front of everybody.
Lucille: Everybody? Who's everybody? Who's everybody?
Lindsay: You know, the kids, Gob, Tobias, everybody.
Lucille: He didn't invite Buster. Buster's his brother too. What's wrong with Buster?
Narrator: And even as she asked the question, Lucille realized that perhaps it was time to let her own baby bird fly away.

Quote from Lucille

Michael: Why do I have to take him?
Lucille: Because he's your brother. And you run around with everyone else, going on bike rides, making cornholes.
Michael: Mom, listen-
Lucille: Everyone's laughing, riding and cornholing except Buster. And I know he's not the sharpest knife in the drawer, but he's sensitive, Michael, and you could pretend to be interested in him.
Michael: Fine. He can hang out, but he's going to work, okay? This is not going to be a day at the beach.
Buster: Th- That's cool. Mom packed me a change of clothes.
Narrator: So Buster stayed and Michael made him build the new bike.

Quote from Buster

Gob: What's he doing here? Why is he in his bathing suit?
Buster: Mom dropped me off to spend time with Michael.
Gob: Spend time with Michael, or to serve her own menopausal needs?
Michael: She's always got to wedge herself in the middle of us, so she can control everything.
Buster: Yeah. Mom's awesome. Maybe we should call her.

Quote from George Michael

Maeby: I'm surprised you tried out for this.
George Michael: Yeah. I just love the theater.
Maeby: That's great. I'm just doing it to kiss Steve Holt.
George Michael: Well, actually, I think I'm gonna quit. Yeah, theater's dead.
Maeby: But, he's always going to be at football practice, so I'm gonna have to kiss the stand-in.
George Michael: But, no. No. I love the theater and I gave my word, so I'm back in.

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