Ava Quote #78
Quote from Ava in Open House
Janine: No, it's just... I know what it's like to be a child at one of those pivotal moments, and, uh... You know, parents should be involved.
Gregory: But what are you afraid she's gonna end up like?
Ava: [enters] [sings] ♪ I got the sounds for your ass, and it's easy to see ♪ ♪ That this DJ be Ava C! ♪ I'm DJ'ing the open house! DJ A-V-A! Whatever.
Gregory: The superintendent is coming. Don't you think you should act more like... you know, a... principal?
Ava: Yeah, well, if the superintendent has notes for me, I got a note for him: don't let me catch you cheating on your wife. [laughs]
Gregory: What are you talking about?
Ava: Oh, you don't know? I caught him with the Deaconess. That's how I got this job. He thought he could get away with a thot, but he thought wrong. That's a tongue twister.
Gregory: Wait. Are you saying...
Ava: That that man is in my pocket like Jay-Z after the elevator. [laughs] I'ma go set up. Y'all got any requests, ask your mama, 'cause I don't take requests.
Abbott Elementary Quotes
‘Open House’ Quotes
Quote from Melissa
Melissa: Okay, I'm back. Had to show a couple of parents... how to get to another school. They were in the wrong place. [reshuffles cards] Oh, sorry, Mr. Johnson, I gotta do that. Last time I trusted someone else to shuffle, I lost a kidney.
Quote from Mr. Johnson
[After studying his hand, Jacob goes to slide all his chips in]
Melissa: Okay! Just wait. I can't let you do this, kid. Why don't we just say we're playing for these chips and not real money?
Mr. Johnson: A bet is a bet. I gambled away my house, my car, and my subscription to Horse Fancy. No one ever said, "That's okay, Mr. Johnson. It was an honest mistake."
Quote from Ava
Ava: [over P.A.] Principal A-A-Ava, son! Another one! Check out this oldie but goodie by my guy Ginuwine! It's called "Pony," y'all! And he ain't talking about a horse! ["Pony" plays over P.A.] Superintendent Collins, you showed.
Superintendent Collins: Just stopping by for a quick tour.
Ava: Well, if you want to waste your time, fine by me. But you know if you got a problem, there's nothing you can do about it.
Superintendent Collins: It's my job to be here.
Ava: Well, I wouldn't want to cheat you out of a tour. [chuckles] I say that 'cause you cheated on your wife.
Superintendent Collins: I got it the first time.
Ava: Let me put on some Toni Braxton. You'll like this one. It's called... [echoing] "Love Shoulda Brought You Home"!