Ava: Okay. Thinking about turning that into my wo-man cave. My Lady Lair. Somewhere I can take naps and watch Housewives. Do you think I could fit a Jacuzzi in there?
Superintendent Collins: Do you think you should be doing that on school grounds?
Ava: Do you think you should be doing what you did on church grounds? [scoffs]

Gregory: Hey! Superintendent Collins. You remember me?
Superintendent Collins: Gregory Eddie.
Gregory: Mm.
Superintendent Collins: Of course. You gave a really good interview.
Gregory: I thought so, yeah.
Ava: You interviewed for this job? Oh, damn! What happened?
Gregory: It's hard to say. But you made the right choice here with Ava. I don't even know how to DJ, so...
Ava: Why you being all weird? I like you better when you're stoic. Keep the mystery, boo.
Gregory: Great hire. Well-deserved. Really, really well-deserved. [laughs and claps]
Ava: Another Ava super-fan.

Janine: Why is your posture not perfect? You okay? Something happen to your core?
Gregory: My core's fine.
Janine: Oh.
Gregory: I'm just... processing some things.

Janine: Jacob, that was my turn.
Jacob: [sings] Down by the river where the green grass grows, there sat Janine sweet as a rose. Along came Jacob, doing double dutch. Janine's on the sidelines. [to camera] Jealous much? Wow. I'm good. Huh.

Melissa: Okay, we're all set. The food's been ordered. It's gonna get here right in time for the open house.
Jacob: And if we really want to get crazy, I've got my travel Scrabble. I always keep it on my person.
Gregory: Are we gonna have to spend time talking to the parents at the open house? [laughter]
Barbara: I forgot... this is your first open house. Oh.
Jacob: Oh, he's so young. It's adorable. [laughs] [off Gregory's look] I mean, old and dignified.

Barbara: Taylor's visiting from New York, and since open house is usually so long and sparsely attended, I invited her to keep me company.
Janine: Oh, wow! New York. You know, last time I was there, I was shopping on Canal Street, and I see this huge rat. So I pull out my phone to take a picture of it, but then this flying piece of garbage just smacks me in the face, so dropped my phone, went in the gutter, never saw it again.
Taylor: Wow. That story had everything.
Janine: Man, this is so cool 'cause, you know, you're Barbara's blood daughter, and I'm her work daughter.
Taylor: Uh, her work daughter?
Janine: Yep. Oh, God. Oh, no, no, no. You're not jealous, are you? Because you got all the perks.
Taylor: So many perks.
Janine: Yeah, shopping trips, boy talks, period talks. Those must have been moving. I wish I could've gotten one from my mom or even Barbara.
Barbara: [to Taylor] So why don't we just take a look at some of the children's art?
Taylor: Yeah.
[aside to camera:]
Janine: Oh, I can't even imagine having a mom like Barbara. I used to do this thing with my mom where I would say to her exactly what I wanted to hear, hoping she would just say it back, and she'd just keep playing my Game Boy, so...

Melissa: Hey, Jacob. What are you doing?
Jacob: Oh, me? I'm... just admiring Mr. Dewey and his undefeated decimal system.
Melissa: Come over here. Play some poker.
Jacob: I've never really played.
Melissa: Even better. You got 20 bucks?
Jacob: Well, you know what? Might be worth it to lose a little money for the conversation and camaraderie.
Melissa: Yeah, whatever.

Taylor: How about I take you to dinner after this?
Barbara: Take me? I'm taking you. [chuckles] Where do you want to go? I heard...
Janine: [enters] I heard Burrata's really good. Yeah. Tariq always says he's gonna take me there when he signs a record deal, but he hasn't been offered one yet, so I'm just holding off on reservations. [chuckles]
Barbara: Okay. Well, we'll take that under consideration.
Taylor: Maybe we could...
Janine: You know, I know lots of special places I haven't been to yet, so don't be afraid to ask.

Janine: Well, so what do you do, Taylor?
Taylor: I represent a global brand. We promote friendship and fun...
Barbara: She sells booze.
Taylor: I'm a rep for a high-end alcohol company.
Janine: Oh! Oh, I love high-end alcohol. I don't drink it, but I do love the commercials. The Most Interesting Man in the World - he seems interesting to me.

Barbara: The only spirit I recognize is the Spirit of the Lord.
Taylor: Here we go again.
Barbara: I'm just saying, with your gifts, you could be helping people.
Taylor: You don't need to "just say" that, Mom.
Barbara: Well, I feel like I do.
Janine: See, this is the kind of open dialogue that I'm hoping to have with this parent later...
Taylor: Well, I'm sorry we can't all be Saint Barbara.
Janine: Well, I wasn't saying she was like a saint, saint. She hasn't been recognized by the church, I don't think.