- Friends 1994-2004
- The Office 2005-2013
- Seinfeld 1989-1998
- The Golden Girls 1985-1992
- Schitt's Creek 2015-2020
- Modern Family 2009-2020
- New Girl 2011-2018
- How I Met Your Mother 2005-2014
- Everybody Loves Raymond 1996-2005
- Parks and Recreation 2009-2015
- Frasier 1993-2004
- The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air 1990-1996
- Derry Girls 2018-
- Scrubs 2001-2010
- Everybody Hates Chris 2005-2009
- The Goldbergs 2013-
- Cheers 1982-1993
- Home Improvement 1991-1999
- Monk 2001-2009
- The Good Place 2016-2020
- Boy Meets World 1993-2000
- The Middle 2009-2018
- Gilmore Girls 2000-2007
- Arrested Development 2003-2006, 2013-2019 COMING SOON
- 23 shows
- 360 characters
- 3,807 episodes
- 133,125 quotes
Michael Scott: I suppose summer had to end sometime. It's sad, though, because I had a great summer. I got West Nile virus, lost a ton of weight. Then I went back to the lake. I stepped on a piece of glass in the parking lot, which hurt. That got infected even though I peed on it. Saw Inception. Or at least I dreamt I did.
Rachel: Well, now that everybody has ordered, I would like to start the celebration and make a toast to Phoebe. She dropped her sock.
Phoebe: Aw. What?
Rachel: No. No, Emma dropped her sock.
Monica: Mom's here? I wanted to have lunch with her today. She told me she was out of town.
Rachel: Ross, she still has not noticed that the baby's sock is on the ground.
Phoebe: It's a good toast.
Rachel: Look, will you please get her attention?
Ross: Oh. Mommy? Mother. [mouths] Sock.
Phoebe: Oh, for God's sake. Judy, pick up the sock! Pick up the sock! Pick up the sock!
Joey: Where is the waitress? I'm starving.
Chandler: It's a buffet, man.
Joey: Oh, here's where I win all my money back!
Rose: I don't drink before bedtime. I stop all liquids at noon and I still wake up.
Sophia: I never have that problem. Never. I sleep like a log. I never get up in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom. I go in the morning. Every morning like clockwork, at 7 am I pee. Unfortunately, I don't wake up till 8.
J.D.: [v.o.] It's always nice when someone from Carla's family comes to town. Mostly because she cleans our apartment.
Carla: Why is there a pancake in the silverware drawer?
Turk: You mean, why is there silverware in the pancake drawer? Wuh-huh!
David: So, let me ask you a question right off the bat, what do you think are your greatest strengths as a manager?
Michael Scott: Why don't I tell you what my greatest weaknesses are? I work too hard, I care too much, and sometimes I can be too invested in my job.
David: Okay. And your strengths?
Michael Scott: Well, my weaknesses are actually strengths.
David: Oh. Yes. Very good.
Michael Scott: There you go.
Claire: You know, honey, if anything were ever to happen to me, I would want you to get remarried.
Claire: Mmm. That was a little fast.
Phil: Oh, no. I just want to make you happy.
Claire: Okay. Any idea of who you would remarry?
Phil: Vicky Conroy probably. She works in my office. She's very organized. The kids love her.
Alex: Are you guys talking about Vicky?
Alex: Mom, she's awesome.
Phil: Just so you know, if something were to happen to me, I-
Claire: Something's gonna happen to you, all right.
Julius: I knew this androgynous guy when I was coming up.
Chris: You did?
Julius: Yeah. He was one of the baddest dudes I ever met. Pink Bobby Jenkins. He was androgynous way before it was popular. Everybody used to make fun of him.
Chris: Pink Bobby? So did you guys hang out?
Julius: Nope. I didn't want people to think I was androgynous. Then one day, I was coming home from school, and these guys jumped me. Oh, they had me too. Then, next thing I know, here comes Pink Bobby. Man, Pink Bobby was knocking suckers out. I asked him why'd he help me, even though I wouldn't talk to him. But he said he didn't care that I didn't talk to him. It was because I didn't talk about him. After that, we were always cool.
Chris: And people didn't think you were androgynous?
Julius: Look, Chris, unless you show up in a dress, heels and makeup, nobody's gonna think you're androgynous.
Chris: Thanks, Dad.
Quote from Rachel Green in Friends episode The One with Monica and Chandler's Wedding (Part 2)
Rachel: The nights are the hardest. But then the day comes and that's every bit as hard as the night. And then the night comes again...
Monica: The days and nights are hard, I get it. Look, Rachel, I'm sorry. I have to start getting ready. I'm getting married today.
Rachel: I know. At dusk. That's such a hard time for me.
Nick: You really think mine was food? I can think of five other reasons I wanted to be your friend. Boob, boob, vagina, butt cheek, butt cheek.
Schmidt: In that order?
Nick: Well, I'm not gonna say, "vagina, butt cheek, boob, butt cheek, boob."
Schmidt: Yeah, but that's the correct-
Nick: That's the order, yeah.
We have added over 6,000 quotes from the 2000s comedy-drama series Gilmore Girls to the site. The show focuses on fast-talking, coffee-drinking mother and daughter Lorelai and Rory Gilmore, who have an especially close relationship since Lorelai had Rory when she was sixteen. Wanting the best for her daughter, Lorelai is even willing to reconnect with her estranged parents, Richard and Emily, so Rory can attend a local private school.
Catch up with your favorite quotes from the Gilmores: Lorelai, Rory, Richard and Emily; and the residents of Stars Hollow: Sookie, Lane, Michel, Luke and Kirk.Find your favorite quotes from the Gilmore Girls
We have added over 7,000 quotes from The Middle, the ABC sitcom which aired from 2009 to 2018. The show follows Frankie, a middle-aged mother in a middle-class family living in the middle of America. The series starred Patricia Heaton, Neil Flynn, Charlie McDermott, Eden Sher and Atticus Shaffer. Catch up with your favorite quotes from the Hecks: Frankie, Mike, Axl, Sue and Brick.Check out quotes from The Middle
We have added quotes from the NBC comedy The Good Place which ran from 2016 to 2020. The show follows Eleanor Shellstrop, a woman whose life on Earth was not marked by magnanimity, who nevertheless arrives in a heavenly utopia following her untimely death. The series stars Kristen Bell, William Jackson Harper, Jameela Jamil, D'Arcy Carden, Manny Jacinto and Ted Danson. Catch up with your favorite quotes from Eleanor, Chidi, Tahani, Janet, Jason and Michael.Check out quotes from The Good Place
We have added over 6,800 quotes from the '90s sitcom Home Improvement, which starred Tim Allen, Patricia Richardson, Earl Hindman, Zachary Ty Bryan, Jonathan Taylor Thomas, Taran Noah Smith, Richard Karn and Debbe Dunning. Catch up with your favorite quotes from Tim "The Tool Man" Taylor, Jill, Wilson, Brad, Randy, Mark, Al and Heidi.Find your favorite quotes from Home Improvement
We have added over 3,000 quotes from Everybody Hates Chris, the 2005-2009 sitcom based on Chris Rock's teenage years in Brooklyn in the 1980s. The show starred Tyler James Williams, Terry Crews, Tichina Arnold, Tequan Richmond, Imani Hakim and Vincent Martella, and was narrated by Chris Rock. Catch up with your favorite quotes from Chris, Julius, Rochelle, Drew, Tonya and Greg.Check out quotes from Everybody Hates Chris