Dick: You're upset, aren't you? Tell the truth.
Mary: Yes. I thought I could trust you. I can't.
Dick: Trust me? You're the one who lied and tricked me.
Mary: No. It's not how you lie to trick someone. First, you start by- You have something on your tie. [flicks Dick's nose when he looks down] Ah-ha, very clever. Yes, I see how that works. You have something on your shoulder.
Mary: [chuckles] Ah, I don't- [Dick slaps Mary] That's not how it works.

Harry: I'll have a pitcher of that stuff.
Waitress: May I see your driver's license?
Harry: Oh, you bet you can.
Waitress: Okay, Mrs... Wu.

Dick: I think these humans bend the truth because this is a difficult place to live. It's a lonely blue dot on the far end of the galaxy. And all the half-truths and flattery and diplomacy are the lubricant that people spread on each other to get over the rough spots.
Tommy: It's a lot easier on our planet. No one ever lies.
Dick: Except, of course, when you don't want to help somebody move.
Sally: I was sick that day.
Dick: I helped you move.
Sally: I had two boxes.
Dick: Who packed the boxes?
Sally: Okay, listen, if we're gonna...