Sally Solomon Quotes Page 2 of 40
Quote from Dick for Tat
Harry: Okay. We got one Pastrami Lasorda. And one Mozzarella Fitzgerald.
Tommy: I don't get the names of these sandwiches.
Harry: Tommy, here's your Hammy Connick Jr.
Sally: Well, that one's obvious. Look, it's piled high with ham and connick.
Quote from Dick and Tuck
Sally: Unbelievable. Look at all these magazines. Everything revolves around the beautiful people. They have it all. I mean how are the rest of us supposed to compete?
Harry: Well, you got a big hunk of celery in your teeth, and that won't help.
Sally: Thanks. Look at this. Every beautiful woman is with a beautiful guy.
Harry: Yeah, we do tend to gravitate to our own kind.
Sally: Man, how did a gorgeous guy like Don end up with a double-bagger like me?
Harry: It's a brain-teaser.
Sally: It's wrong. It is wrong, Harry. I mean, this- This is the life Don should be living. He should be the dude with the hot babe on his shoulders. And he should be on the jet-ski with a menthol cigarette in his mouth but he's not. Because I'm draggin' him down. I'm draggin' my beautiful Donny down.
Harry: Mmm. You know, I didn't want to say anything, but you totally are.
Sally: Thanks, Harry. Now I know what to do.
Quote from Dick and Tuck
Sally: Come on, Don. Stop pretending. I mean, you and I both know that a relationship cannot last when one of the people looks like me and the other looks like you.
Don: Damn it! I knew one day you'd wake up and realize what was goin' on.
Sally: Don't kick yourself, Donny. We gave it our best shot.
Don: I thought we were beyond looks, Sally.
Sally: Come on, Don. Look at you. How could we get beyond that?
Don: Yeah, I guess so.
Sally: Don't get me wrong. I appreciate your kindness. Not many men would hang in there with a gal as unattractive as me.
Don: What?
Sally: Don't make me spell it out for you, Don. I know I'm as ugly as they come. I don't even know how you can stand to look at me.
Don: ... ... Well, Sally, I'm not gonna lie to ya. It's been hard. It's been a real struggle. And granted, we'll continue to get stares out in public, but... that's a price I'm willing to pay because I love you.
Sally: Oh, Donny! Oh, ho ho! Thank you! Thank you!
Quote from Dick, Who's Coming to Dinner?
Dick: Does anyone remember why we all decided to be White?
Harry: Oh. Um, I went with White 'cause I thought I'd be a little cooler in the summer.
Tommy: Well, don't you remember, Dick? All the television signals that we picked up in outer space were filled with White people.
Sally: Oh, except for that, uh, that Black nerd with the hiked-up pants and the oversized glasses. What was his name?
Tommy: Bryant Gumbel.
Sally: Right.
Quote from Sex and the Sally
Sally: Well, I'm going to Don's. We're gonna have sex tonight.
Dick: That sounds like fun.
Tommy: Hey, Sally, are you ovulating?
Sally: No. Are you?
Tommy: No. But you ought to be careful tonight at Don's. You know, he's got millions of sperm.
Sally: Who told you that?
Tommy: I just learned it. I'm just saying you don't wanna get pregnant.
Sally: Pfft! You can't get pregnant like that. You get pregnant from... sitting on a toilet seat or swimming in a pool with some guys.
Harry: Oh, no.
Quote from Sex and the Sally
Dr. Severson: Okay. Well, what method were you interested in exploring?
Sally: Well, I don't want him to know I'm using it, so I don't want anything loud.
Dr. Severson: Loud?
Sally: Yeah. I mean, it would just crush him if he knew I didn't want to have his kids.
Dr. Severson: Oh, right. Well, uh... this is the sponge. It's small and highly effective.
Sally: Sponge?
Dr. Severson: Oh, I get it. It's so small, that by the time you're done doing the dishes, you're too exhausted to have sex, right?
Dick: Do they come with a scouring side?
Dr. Severson: No, no. You see, the sponge, the diaphragm, these are barrier methods. You insert them before sex.
Sally: Ooh, mood killer.
Dick: It's not for us.
Quote from Sex and the Sally
Sally: Don, I- I have to tell you something. I've been taking pills.
Don: Pills! I should've known. What are they? Uppers? Downers? Lubies? Beanballs?
Sally: Worse. Birth control pills. That's why I've been acting so crazy.
Don: You been taking birth control pills? Why didn't you tell me?
Sally: I just didn't want you to think I didn't want to have your baby 'cause I do... if I wanted to have a baby, which I don't.
Don: Well, that's all right, Sally. Neither do I. That's why I use protection.
Sally: You do?
Don: Of course. What'd you think was in those little foil packets?
Sally: I thought those were airplane peanuts.
Don: Airplane peanuts?
Sally: Yeah. And I used to wonder why, before sex, you'd go into the bathroom and eat peanuts by yourself, but I figured, you know, "Hey, whatever gets you in the mood," right?
Quote from Gwen, Larry, Dick and Mary
Sally: Now, was it moist?
Man: It was moist, ma'am.
Crowd: Ah.
Sally: What is the matter with these people?
Tommy: Beats me, ma'am.
Sally: You, buster, you better grow up. You owe this woman twenty minutes of drying time.
Mrs. Dubcek: I told you.
Sally: And you, young lady, you better drop that attitude. Here's a little piece of advice, you've heard this before: Colors fade but dumb is forever. Next! [slams fabric conditioner on the table]
Quote from Dick and Harry Fall Down a Hole
Sally: Who are you?
Angus McDuff: The name's Angus McDuff, but if you want my attention, you'll call me The Hole.
Don: Isn't that a great nickname, Sally? He fights holes, and they call him "The Hole."
Sally: Doesn't that get a little confusing?
Angus McDuff: No problems yet.
Sally: No, but I mean, you wouldn't call a fireman "fire," or a lifeguard "water," right?
Angus McDuff: I'm not a nickname expert, I'm a hole expert.
Sally: Fine, let's just deal with the hole.
Angus McDuff: You are dealing with The Hole.
Sally: No, I mean the hole my brothers are in.
Don: He's not a financial advisor, he's a hole guy.
Sally: You see, I knew this would happen.
Quote from Dick Solomon's Day Off
Don: Are you sure, Sally? 'Cause I could have sworn I left it here.
Sally: What did you say it was again? A radio station?
Don: A radio scanner.
Tommy: Is that like a CAT scanner?
Harry: No, I think if there was a CAT scan machine in here, we'd know about it.
Don: Just keep your eyes open. Let me know if you find it.
Sally: Okay, we will, Don. And I hope you find your cat.