TV Quotes

Dick: So, what has this flagrant display of insensitivity taught you, Mary?
Mary: That you don't have a monopoly on idiotic behavior.
Dick: Exactly.
Mary: So, Dick, can you forgive and forget?
Dick: Oh, I forgive. But I don't forget. And I don't forgive.

Tommy: Where did you find those?
Dick: In your sock drawer.
Sally: How could you? After all we've done for you.
Tommy: Okay. It's not what you think.
Dick: It's exactly what I think. It's oregano and fresh rosemary.
Sally: I can't believe it. You can cook!
Harry: You punk!
Tommy: No! No, I can't cook. I swear!
Dick: Then how do you explain this?
Tommy: This, uh... it's marijuana.
Dick: This whole time we've been eating her slop, and you're a damn gourmet!
Tommy: No! No, it's pot. I swear. I- I smoke it with my friends. I- I love to toke up on the fat daddies... dude.

Vicki Dubcek: Well, I think we can all learn a lot from what's just happened here. This feud ends now.
Dick: That's easier said than done.
Vicki Dubcek: Mama, you fix their bathroom. Dick, you pay your rent. See?
Dick: Wow. You've been thinking about this a lot.
Vicki Dubcek: You know, I do like to think of myself as the female Golda Meir.

Vicki Dubcek: So, Dr. Albright, how are things treatin' you at the hospital? I'll bet those HMOs are just makin' you crazy, huh? [chuckles]
Mary: I'm not that kind of doctor, Vicki.
Vicki Dubcek: So, you mean, like, you're, like, a veterinarian, or what?