Tommy: What happened to your coat?
Harry: I don't know what happened to it, so Ms. Dubcek let me borrow this one. Sweet woman.
Tommy: So you lost your coat? Oh, tough break.
Harry: I lost more than a coat, Tommy! I lost a friend, a buddy, a companion who kept me warm when it was cold and warmer when it was really sort of too hot to be wearing a coat.

Sally: Dick, I've been thinking about this "humor" thing. Why don't you try what those guys on TV do? Everybody says they're funny?
Tommy: Oh, yeah, those guys!
Sally: You know... [Sally, Harry and Tommy imitate The Three Stooges]
Dick: The McLaughlin Group? No. They're not funny at all.

Dick: Lieutenant, I need your help. I need you to find out what's funny.
Sally: Oh, I can't. [knocks Harry down with a plank of wood] I've got to build this, I ran out of room for my shoes.
Dick: Well, this is more important. It's about me!
Sally: Well, how am I supposed to know what's funny? [knocks Harry down again]
Tommy: What's so important about a sense of humor anyway?
Dick: Oh, come on, Tommy. Having a sense of humor is having the power to transform someone's mood, to lift his spirit. You give it to someone you love when she really needs it. And I just found out today that Mary's been getting it from another man.
Tommy: Dick, I think this whole " being funny" thing is just innate.
Dick: What do you think, Lieutenant?
Sally: What do I think? [Harry ducks as Sally swings the plank] I think either you got it or you don't. [Sally knocks down Tommy]
Dick: Oh! Look what you just did! [Sally knocks down Harry and then Tommy again]
Sally: What's wrong with you guys?
Dick: Come on! Wake up, you two! [sprays them with water] Come on! How am I ever gonna find out what's funny?