Dick Quote #1202
Dick: Oh, I can't get his face out of my mind!
Dick: No, Nina. Little Davey Tennant, the boy down the block. You see, ever since he was three years old, Davey's wanted more than anything to see a real professional baseball game. He wished the biggest wish his little heart could muster. But his dad was laid off and couldn't afford the tickets. Well... one day last week, little Davey was outside playing ball like he always does, and who should walk up the block, tall as a building, but home run king Mark McGwire. To see little Davey's eyes light up as McGwire handed him four seats on the first base line, well, it's something that I will never forget. [shouts] Yes, Strudwick's face! Stop asking such stupid questions!
Nina: Look, you knew about her past.
Dick: Yeah, but until last night, her past was- was faceless! Now it's got a face. The fuzzy, smirking face of Vincent W. Strudwick.
Quote from Sally
Harry: Okay. We got one Pastrami Lasorda. And one Mozzarella Fitzgerald.
Tommy: I don't get the names of these sandwiches.
Harry: Tommy, here's your Hammy Connick Jr.
Sally: Well, that one's obvious. Look, it's piled high with ham and connick.
Quote from Dick
Mary: "Truth or dare."
Dick: "Who was your last fling?"
Mary: Oh, that would have to be... [both laugh] Vincent Strudwick. [both laugh]
Dick: Strudwick?! No!
Mary: Yes, I'm back on Martini Island! You can set me up.
Dick: You can kiss my tiny pewter ass!
Quote from Dick
Dick: Ah, isn't this great? Look at us. An Earth family sitting around together on a beautiful autumn evening, playing a nice, friendly game.
Tommy: Yeah, a game called Sex or Consequences.
Dick: "The naughty, bawdy adult party game where everybody wants to be on top!"
Quote from Brains and Eggs
Mary: For future reference, I have a red Volvo.
Dick: [gasps] Please, Dr. Albright! We barely know each other.
Quote from Fear and Loathing in Rutherford
Strudwick: You know, it's funny. I used to bring these creamers home to Alissa. She'd have little tea parties with her stuffed animals. They grow up quick, don't they?
Dick: Yeah. I can remember when Tommy didn't even know how to wipe his own butt. Then he figured it out all on his own. And taught me.
Quote from Dick's First Birthday
Dick: I'm done. How do I look?
[Dick removes the hair cap to revealed his freshly-dyed jet black hair]
Sally: Um, Dick, um... Okay, if somebody were helping you with an experiment and things went awry and you became horribly disfigured, you wouldn't hold it against them, now would you?
Dick: Why? What happened?
Sally: Nothing. Destroy all the mirrors now!
Dick: No, no! I've got to see! [holds up a hand mirror] Oh, my God! I'm gorgeous!