Dick: Vicki, you remember my true love, Dr. Mary Albright?
Vicki Dubcek: Oh, yes.
Mary: Nice to see you again, Vicki.
Vicki Dubcek: Oh, yes, ma'am, it's nice to see you, too. Doctor. [chuckles] You know, I have this little pain in my lower back-
Mary: Oh, Vicki, I'm not that kind of doctor. I'm a doctor of anthropology.
Vicki Dubcek: What is that? Is that, like, the rear?

Dick: So, what has this flagrant display of insensitivity taught you, Mary?
Mary: That you don't have a monopoly on idiotic behavior.
Dick: Exactly.
Mary: So, Dick, can you forgive and forget?
Dick: Oh, I forgive. But I don't forget. And I don't forgive.

Tommy: Where did you find those?
Dick: In your sock drawer.
Sally: How could you? After all we've done for you.
Tommy: Okay. It's not what you think.
Dick: It's exactly what I think. It's oregano and fresh rosemary.
Sally: I can't believe it. You can cook!
Harry: You punk!
Tommy: No! No, I can't cook. I swear!
Dick: Then how do you explain this?
Tommy: This, uh... it's marijuana.
Dick: This whole time we've been eating her slop, and you're a damn gourmet!
Tommy: No! No, it's pot. I swear. I- I smoke it with my friends. I- I love to toke up on the fat daddies... dude.