Sally: Oh, my God. Look at this place.
Tommy: Those interlocking chairs go on for miles.
Harry: It's so bright. Like heaven.
Sally: Look at all the machines.
Tommy: We could do more than one load at once.
Sally: [gasps] Yes! Now all my cute little tops will never again cross paths with your skidmarked jockeys.
Tommy: This is the future.
Sally: Oh, it's broadband, baby.

Dick: Sally, Tommy, Harry, please sit down. There's something I have to tell you and it's not going to be easy. I know how much you all enjoy the times that you've spent with Mary and me...
Sally: Dick, is that vest a little stinky?
Dick: Maybe a little.
Sally: Okay, give it to me.
Dick: But Mary and I have come to a decision.
Harry: Well, you know I think those pants might be a little crusty, too.
Tommy: Yeah. Stand up.
[After Dick stands up and slips his shoes off, Sally starts unbuttoning his shirt while Tommy and Harry remove his pants]
Dick: We want to spend all of our free time with Gwen and Larry. Mary says, and I have to agree with her, that it's rare for two couples to mesh together so perfectly. And so I'm afraid that means that we won't be spending any more time with the three of you.
Sally: Aw, that's a shame. Hey, got any quarters?
Dick: Yeah. There's a couple in the left-hand pocket.
Sally: Okay. Great. See you later. Bye-bye.

Man: Hey, that's my machine!
Sally: What're you talking about? It's empty.
Man: No, I put my magazine on it to hold it.
Sally: Well, what's that supposed to do?
Tommy: This is chaos.
Sally: Look, you cannot reserve anything with a magazine.
Tommy: That's right.
Sally: I'm sorry, man. Those are the rules.
Man: Whose rules?
Sally: [squares up to him] My rules.
Man: Can I at least get my magazine back?
Sally: No.
Tommy: Yeah, you keep walking, jerky.
Sally: Run!

Miranda: Hey, I was hoping you'd come back.
Harry: I came back to say good-bye.
Miranda: Well, can't we go across the street to the diner and get a cup of coffee or something?
Harry: June bug, what we had here was very special. Hum of the dryers, fluorescent lights, sweet, sweet smell of softener sheets. But take that away, and I'm afraid we got nothing.
Miranda: What are you, some kind of moron?
Harry: I know it's hard to understand, but, uh, at least we'll always have this, huh? And this. [holds up a pair of panties]
Miranda: Hey! Oh, that's gross.
Harry: That's right. That's right. Fight daddy. Fight daddy.

Mary: What the hell just happened here?
Dick: Mary, there's something I haven't told you about those two.
Mary: What?
Dick: They don't- They don't- I don't like them.
Mary: Why?
Dick: They're tedious and pretentious and completely self-absorbed. Mary, our time together is too precious to waste with people like that.
Mary: They were getting a little dull. I found myself doing all the talking.
Dick: I could listen to you all day.
Mary: So, anyway, the trip through wine country. I was with my friend Charlotte. And we...
Dick: Didn't you forget the part about the train ride?
Mary: Yeah. Have I told this already?
Dick: No.
Mary: So, anyway, Charlotte's French...
Both: wasn't very good. And I, of course, had just come back from the Sorbonne so we're sitting at this table, and a man approaches the table wearing the most humongous collar...

Tommy: Okay, Albright. In the back.
Mary: This is ridiculous, the next time I'm sitting in the front.
Harry: I call shotgun for next time.
Sally: I call shotgun for time after that.
Mary: Shotgun infinity.
Sally: Can she call shotgun infinity?
Tommy: I'm afraid so.
Mary: Yes!

Mary: There's a woman in my tennis clinic, Gwen McMichael, very sweet. I'll call her and see if she and her husband would like to join us for dinner.
Dick: Uh, all right. But just to be safe, I'd better bring along Candyland.

Larry: I hope we haven't kept you waiting too long.
Mary: Oh, no, not at all. I love watching people. It's what I do. After all I do have a Ph.D. in anthropology. [laughs]

Mary: Oh, this is Dick. Dick?
Dick: My name is Dick Solomon. I'm from Ohio. I like to read books. My favorite color is red. I- I teach physics, and my dream is to someday learn to ride a bicycle.

Gwen: You know, Mary, if it were up to my husband, we'd probably never socialize at all. I mean, we'd probably never even leave the house.
Larry: Why should I leave the house? I've got cable.
Dick: [laughs] He's got cable.
Mary: The only television I watch is the History Channel.