Dick: So I'm racking my brain. What's a fresh, fun new way to raise $10,000? Something crazy, but makes perfect sense all at once. And I'm walking by Fashions by Pepe, and it hits me like a cape to the throat: fashion show.
Judith: A fashion show?
Dick: Hot Winter Nights. That's the theme.
Strudwick: For the... fashion show?
Dick: Yeah. Now help me out. Ticket prices. I was thinking $50 for seats by the runway. You know, for the Mickey Rourke types.
Judith: I wish I was going to be in town that weekend. When is it?

Strudwick: Oh, good. Dean Albright, Dick was just telling us this idea-
Mary: Oh, he told you about the fashion show.
Judith: He told us all about it.
Mary: Isn't it great?
Strudwick: Fabulous!
Judith: Count me in!
Strudwick: Just great!
Dick: Hot Winter Nights.
Strudwick: Where did you come up with the idea?
Dick: Right here.

Harry: Well, I think we should expand.
Tommy: Expand?! Are you out of your mind? We haven't sold a cup.
Harry: Well, wait till we get to the big cities. That's where the thirsty people are.
Tommy: You are a meathead.

Sally: What's up?
Don: Why are all my old girlfriends here?
Sally: Sweetie, look I lost it when I found out you had relationships before me. But now that I've met them all, I'm cool with it.
Don: That's great, Sally.
Sally: I know how you got together with them, I know what you did with them, and I know why you broke up.
Don: That's nice.
Sally: I know where you've been, I know what you've had, and I know how you got rid of it.

Strudwick: Still... what a night.
Judith: The gala event of the season.
Dick: This?! 12 professor's wives trudging down a makeshift runway in poly blends and support hose?!
Judith: The rumaki was delicious.

Don: Oh, Sally I've gotta tell you that this is the best relationship I've ever been in.
Sally: Oh, wow, Don that is so... so... Wow.
Don: What's the matter?
Sally: Nothing. I guess I just never thought about you having another relationship before.
Don: No one can hold a candle to you, Sally.
Sally: That's real sweet, Don.

Harry: Tommy! Tommy! Dubcek's grandson is selling lemonade down the street for 25 cents a shot.
Tommy: 25 cents? Do you know what kind of markup that must be? This kid's gotta be making a fortune.
Harry: Well, he was wearing a digital watch.
Tommy: See?

Sally: Well, I just found out something about Don I never knew.
Harry: That his back is literally covered in pimples.
Sally: Worse. He had another relationship before me.
Harry & Tommy: No.
Sally: Yes! Oh, my God, you guys what do you think? You think she's pretty? Tall. Blond.
Harry: Wow. She sounds hot.
Tommy: Shut up.
Sally: I gotta figure out where she works, what she does. I gotta know everything about her.
Tommy: Why?
Sally: 'Cause I don't know anything about her.

Don: Well, Sally, I'm off.
Sally: Uh, Don, um... this- This table's a little wobbly. Um, could I use your address book to prop it up?
Don: Can't you just use a matchbook?
Sally: I don't wanna use a matchbook. I wanna use your widdle addwess book.
Don: Well, why didn't you say so to begin with?

Lucy: I'm supposed to give you this.
Dick: "Dr. And Mrs. Albright"? No, this isn't for me. This is for Mary and her wife.
Nina: I think you're Mrs. Albright.
Dick: Me? [laughs] Oh, that's rich! Wait'll Mary hears about this. [laughs] Right over your heads.