Harry: No, not Flashdance. You were on the new Fame!

Sally: All right, boys, here is how it's gonna go down, all right? Either I get paid in full for my jacket, or I am walking out of here with that Action News desk.
Marty: I got a better idea. You got more knowledge and training than anyone we have. How would you like to be our new weather girl?
Sally: Me? On TV? Okay.

Dick: Harry, this time apart from Mary is a great opportunity to hang out with you, like we used to.
Harry: I don't remember that.
Dick: Yeah that's how much fun we had.
Harry: Oh. Well, should I go get some beers?
Dick: Ah, ah, ah, ah. No need. I've got a whole pitcher of mai tais... right here! Mary's favorite. Look. I've even got parasols. There you go! This is so cool. With Mary, it's all about candlelight. But not for us guys. That's why I got paper lanterns.

Mary: [answers phone] Hello?
Dick: Hello? Did you call? Because I was in the shower. I don't have a thing on.
Mary: I didn't call.
Dick: Are you sure? Because the phone rang. How are you?
Mary: Dick!
Dick: [sing-song] Whatcha doin'?
Mary: I'm watching a film.
Dick: Oh! Is it a film that we saw together and you're watching it because it reminds you of me?
Mary: If you must know, it's Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo. I'm hanging up now.
Dick: No. No, no. Mary, wait. There's... There's something I have to ask you.
Mary: Well, quickly!
Dick: [sing-song] Whatcha doin'? [Mary hangs up] [sighs] If only she looked at me the way she looked at Deuce Bigalow, male gigolo.

Mary: [answers phone] Hello?
Dick: Hello, Mary? [sing-song] Whatcha doin'?

Sally: Look at this. When this moist Gulf air collides with this Canadian cold front and this Alberta clipper has her way, a series of tornadoes will level... all of Rutherford.
Dick: Ouch.
Sally: I gotta warn 'em.
Dick: No, you are a security officer first and a weather girl second! You cannot compromise this mission!
Sally: No one else can predict these tornadoes. The other stations will get it all wrong.
Dick: That's because the aliens who work on those stations are keeping their mouths shut!
Sally: Dick, listen to me. At 9:05 tomorrow night, there will be a catastrophic weather event, and people will get hurt.
Dick: You know we are forbidden to change the course of human events. Now, you will stand in front of those cameras, smile your biggest smile, and predict sunny skies and mild temperatures.
Sally: Are you asking me to take a dive?
Dick: I'm not asking, Lieutenant, I'm telling. It's an order.

Sally: So, Har, who you bringing?
Harry: Me?
Sally: Uh-huh.
Harry: Oh! Well, I'm bringin'... Flimfy Jorgensen. Because everything that Flimfy does is just spanky-doodle-doo.

Mary: What are you doing here? Why do you refuse to respect my wishes?
Dick: Mary, prepare yourself for an evening of passion, romance, and dried beef as tender as the night.
Mary: I have plans. I'm going to the movies with Nina.
Dick: Tell her we'll bring her along and then we'll "accidentally" forget to pick her up.
Mary: Yeah, okay, just give me a minute. I just want to check my door. Tell me if it makes a loud bang. [door slams]
Dick: [sing-song] It does!

Chaz Montana: On a lighter note, the fairgrounds welcomed Big Bessie, a Guernsey from Toledo who captured the blue ribbon tipping the scales at 1,200 pounds.
Sally: Ooh!
Chaz Montana: That is one fat cow.
Sally: But not as fat as the one grazing at your apartment, right, Chaz?
Chaz Montana: I- I never said my mom was fat. [laughs] Playful minx!

Sally: Okay, and now for tonight's forecast. It'll be clear and mild, with winds I mean, no winds. No winds. Uh, calm. Dead calm.
Chaz Montana: Well, that's good news for the hundreds of citizens who'll be gathering down at the pier to celebrate the renovation of old downtown.
Sally: Hundreds?
Chaz Montana: Yeah.
Sally: Well, perhaps all of those citizens gathering at the pier should bring, uh, inflatable pillows. Uh, big ones that they can perhaps use as flotation devices.
Chaz Montana: Inflatable pillows? That's kind of an odd thought.
Sally: Well, not so odd, Chaz. You have one in your dressing room shaped like a girl. I've heard you talking to it.
Chaz Montana: Okay, that's a big fat lie!
Sally: All right, then. Have a great tomorrow because Sally says so.