‘Dick on a Roll’
Season 3, Episode 12 - Aired January 7, 1998
After Dick injures himself and needs to use a wheelchair, he is shocked by how difficult it is to access his office in the university. Meanwhile, Sally finally finds something to do in Rutherford when she discovers a hot new nightclub, and Vicki Dubcek returns having taken a vow of celebacy.
Quote from Dick
Chancellor: I would like to start the ceremony by asking Dr. Solomon to say a few words about his achievement here today.
Dick: No, no. Uh... now, there were a lot of people working together here. I- I don't deserve all the blame for this achievement. Right, Sally?
Sally: It's all you, big guy. [crowd cheers]
Chancellor: Go ahead, Dick. Break the ground.
Dick: No, no, no. Please. [applause] If you want to follow somebody, look to Susan Billnitzer. She uses the south entrance, and she's never been happier. So, everybody listen up because this is important. Stop listening to me.
Quote from Dick
Vicki Dubcek: How do you hyperextend your back sitting in a wheelchair?
Dick: By stopping a bulldozer with your bare hands.
Sally: You fell out.
Dick: I fell out.
Quote from Vicki Dubcek
Vicki Dubcek: You know, I've forgotten how many nooks and crannies a man has.
Harry: I'm gonna go have an English muffin.
Quote from Dick
Tommy: I don't understand. How can the Sin Drome be in one day and then out the next day?
Dick: Ah, people are like sheep. They're lost unless they have something to follow. I know. I was the one saddled with the burden of leadership.
Sally: Oh, please! You loved it.
Dick: I did, didn't I? I guess I started to believe my own rhetoric. I never questioned what I was doing. That's the dangerous part. You know, I became a demagogue. I was intoxicated by the crowd's approval until the cause became secondary.
Sally: Don't you mean the cause became stupid?
Dick: Let's not argue semantics, all right?