Dick: Sally, did you take my blue suit to the dry-cleaners?
Sally: Oh, no, it was too expensive, so I dry-cleaned it myself. Here. I think I may have sanded off a button, but...
Dick: You ruined this suit!
Sally: I knew you were gonna say that.

Dick: Look, I will say this once and once only. I am the High Commander and nobody has control of my life, especially Mary, is that understood?
All: Yes, sir.
Dick: Good. Sally, pour me a cup of coffee and a bowl of Monopoly.
Tommy: But, sir-
Sally: Ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah-ah. The High Commander has spoken.

Dick: Mary, we need to talk.
Mary: Oh, Dick can it wait? I'm late for class.
Dick: Mary, I will not be wearing my blue suit to our party tomorrow night.
Mary: That's okay.
Dick: You're positive, it's all right?
Mary: Sure.
Dick: Oh, great. That's great. I'll wear my brown suit.
Mary: Uh, no, no, no. Why don't you wear your blue blazer and khakis?
Dick: Okay.
Mary: And you really should get a haircut before tomorrow night. You can go at lunch.
Dick: No, absolutely not! I'll go at 2:00.

Dick: Ow, ow, ow, ow! [puts down bags] Next time, my answer is paper.

Mary: This whole party was your idea.
Dick: No, it wasn't.
Mary: Yes, it was!
Dick: No, it wasn't!
Mary: Yes, it was!
Dick: No, it wasn't!
Mary: Yes, it was. We were at The Sea Shanty with the Sullivans. You were having crab cakes, which you hated. They sang Happy Birthday to the kid at the next table. You jumped up and said "I wanna have a party too!"
Dick: Oh, that is absolutely untrue!
Mary: Dick, this is your party. You can't leave me alone with those physics guys. I have nothing to say to them!
Dick: Fine, I'll be here. Who needs fun anyway?

Harry: Problem is that you both had your masculine energy zapped by blonde Shiksa goddesses.
Guess that makes me the only real man in the room. Not even Sally can make that claim.
Dick: That's true. How do you do it?
Harry: Who, me? [belches] By keeping it real, Dick. Keeping it real.
Dick: You think you could help me?
Harry: Follow me.

Dick: Hey, did it hurt?
Mary: What?
Dick: When you fell from heaven?
Mary: Oh! What's that smell?
Dick: That's the scent of a man and brut.
Mary: Go home and take a shower. Use steel wool.

Tommy: Sally, the dice are gonna do what they're gonna do, let 'em fly.
Sally: Boardwalk. [screams] No!
Tommy: With a hotel, that $2,000!
Sally: I only got $600, Tommy, $600!
Tommy: Mortgage another property.
Sally: I mortgaged them all.
Tommy: Really? Well, you know what that means.
Sally: It means I lost?
Tommy: No.
Sally: No?
Tommy: It means I won. I won! Oh, you're the warrior, you think that you can win anything. But not this time, pally. This time you're the loser!

Strudwick: There's so much food here, it's like a white hole. And the black hole is at the A&P.

Strudwick: Uh.. revolution. Uh... inertia. Oh! Oh! "Two celestial bodies of equal mass"
Dick & Strudwick: "...sharing a single gravitational field will exhibit identical rotational properties for as long as their inertial integrity is maintained."
Strudwick: This. This is the physics blowout of the semester.
Dick: Okay, who's up for quantum pictionary?