Quote from Tommy in I Enjoy Being a Dick
August: Hey. I just wanted to say that I've invested a lot in this relationship, and if you think you can treat me this way, you're wrong. Your hair looks really good. Tommy: Oh, thanks. August, I can't stand this anymore. I have to tell you something. You're not going to believe this at first. It might even make you sick. It's about my family. [Dick runs up the stairs in women's clothing] Dick: Well, that was a wash. [undresses] The woman I love won't let me be a woman. [sighs] I need some herbal tea and a fat-free cookie. [exits] Tommy: Listen, August, what I needed to tell you was that- August: Don't speak, Tommy. Don't speak. [hugs Tommy]